A father who disappeared for more than a decade suddenly reappears, not with an apology, but with a new “wife,” a new child, and a request for money.

After watching her mother struggle alone to raise her and her brother, this daughter finally built stability for her family…only to be asked to bankroll the family her father created after walking out.

Now she’s being told she’s “harsh” for refusing.

AITAH when i told my father I’m not paying for my sibling’s hospital bills?

So for context, I’m in SEA and i live in a country where there’s no divorce (You can probably already guess where i live) So i apologize in advance if my English is a bit messy, and if I’ll misspell a few things.

My father and my mother got married when my mom was 20, my father was 25. They got married because my mom is well, already pregnant with me. When me and my younger brother were 10 and 7, my dad left us.. he said he wasn’t happy anymore and that the marriage shouldn’t have happened because they rushed into it.

I never heard from him since, only when a few of his relatives would visit.. My mom since then raised us, she would work multiple jobs.. a caregiver at weekdays, and do laundry for other people at weekends to provide for us.

What a woman.

When i graduated from college, i took a job at a call center for 2 years.. then used those experiences to apply for a virtual assistant position since the exchange of dollars to my currency is a lot.

I eventually got us in a place where we are now living comfortably, and my mother doesn’t have to work again because i can provide, and my brother can enroll in a private school.

About last week, my dad suddenly contacted us again after all those years that he disappeared. He said he was sorry, and that he was immature. He introduced his new “wife” to us.. or as i like to call it, glorified mistress because his marriage to my mom was never dissolved.

Wowwww.

He introduced me to his kid with his new “wife”, the kid tried to call me an older sister. I told him he’s not my brother, he’s a stranger to me.

Just this morning, my dad called.. he was begging me for money. His kid just got dengue, and their hospital bills are already piling up.

i told him no, he and his wife can figure stuff out.. like he forced my mom to do when he left for them, and that I don’t have any other sibling.

Absolutely.

My mom told me that i was a bit harsh, and that I should help.. because they’re still family.

But i just can’t bring myself to forgive my father and his new family, for the things they took from me, my mom and my actual younger brother.

So, aitah?

Most readers would say the boundary is justified. OP doesn’t owe financial support to a man who abandoned her, nor to the child he had after leaving the family.

This person says NTA.

This person agrees…this is NOT OP’s responsibility at all.

And this person also agrees…they’re literally strangers, NOT family.

This dad learned the hard way that abandonment doesn’t come with a reimbursement plan.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.