One woman hosted Friendsgiving for the first time and set one simple rule in the group chat: no pets this year.

It wasn’t aimed at anyone…but one friend instantly knew it was about her two dogs…the same dogs who stole food off the table last year.

When the host explained why she didn’t want animals around the food, the crowds, and the kids, the friend accused her of being “controlling” and declared her dogs were “family.”
Then she refused to come and refused to bring the dishes she’d promised.

AITA for asking my friend to not bring her dogs to friendsgiving?

I’m 26f if it matters. So my friends and I do a Friendsgiving every year. I hosted this year for the first time, and I planned everything from decorations, to food, seating, etc.

One of my friends, “Kara,” (24f) has two dogs that she basically takes everywhere. They’re not emotional support animals or anything, she just likes having them around.

Normally I’m okay with her bringing them here for a visit or two, but last year at our other friends house, one of her dogs snatched the dressing off the table and gobbled all of it while everyone was watching the game in the living room.

Oh dear.

I didn’t think this was very funny at the time and decided this year to make sure she can’t bring her animals to my house.

Yesterday in the group chat, I reminded everyone of the start time and I added, “Also, just a heads up, no pets this time, please.” I didn’t single her out specifically; I just made it a general statement.

Immediately, Kara messaged me and asked if that meant her dogs.

Ah, here we go.

I said yes, that I really preferred she not bring them because I don’t want dog hair in the food, I don’t want to be managing animals in addition to hosting, and I don’t want a repeat of last year. There was also going to be several small kids attending, so I wanted to be extra careful.

Well. She didn’t like that and immediately got super snarky and upset. She mentioned she had no one to watch her dogs, and I said they should be fine at home by themselves for a few hours yeah?

She said no, because they had anxiety issues and need to be with her at all times. I said that’s unfortunate but I won’t be changing the rule I set.

Rules are rules.

She told me her dogs are “her family,” that they’re “better behaved than most adults and especially better behaved than kids,” and that I was being “controlling and purposely excluding her.”

She said that if her dogs aren’t allowed, then she’s not coming. I told her I’d be sad if she didn’t come, but the rule stands because i’m hosting this year.

She’s bringing the cake and the potato salad and I asked what her plans were for getting the food here. I even offered to pick it up. She then said she has zero intention of giving any food if her “family” isn’t welcome.

Now we gotta take it out on everyone one?

While frustrating, I just told her that’s unfortunate and that I wish she’d just be a little more understanding, and then had to scramble to find dessert and potato salad at a grocery store halfway across town to fill in.

Now a different friend said I could’ve “handled it more sensitively,” and that maybe I should’ve just let her bring them because “it’s the holidays and it’s not a big deal.” But honestly…it feels like a big deal to ME, because it’s my house and I’m the host.

AITA?

Commenters were torn. Some felt the host should’ve handled the request more sensitively, others said the friend was wildly entitled, and many landed on an ESH for poor communication and overreaction.

This person says it’s one thing to ask not to bring dogs, but to ask that she still bring food?? No.

This person says the timing was a huge issue.

And this person said it’s not THAT big of a deal, but there’s still a “but.”

Turns out nothing splits a holiday table faster than someone insisting their dogs deserve a seat at it.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.