Throwing a party is one thing. Cleaning up after it is a whole different story.

She planned everything and it went off perfectly. Everyone had a great time, especially her brother and his fiancée. But once the party ended and the real work began? Her boyfriend was already out the door.

No offer to help, no “what do you need?”…just gone. And somehow, that’s the part she can’t shake.

AITA for expecting him to help?

I (34f) have been with my bf for 2 years (40m) and recently hosted a small party (9 folks) at my place to celebrate my brother’s engagement. I spent some time planning for it and designing custom things.

The party went off great with decor, activities and more importantly my brother and his fiancé appreciated it and had an absolute blast and tons of fun memories!

Wonderful!

The party ended and he had to go do something back at his place.

I don’t know why but I got upset that he didn’t offer to help clean up afterwards. I had the rest of the folks help which was great. And I did ask him to help before the party and he arrived late and I already got most of the decor done.

Seems like a lot of work.

We got into an argument about it because it felt odd that I had other friends helping and he up and left. Not sure if I was resentful.

Should I expect him to help or at least offer to help if it’s not his family? Or am I overreacting?

Hmmm…

This might also be burnout from having to ask him to do things for me, when these types of things come naturally to me.

If he was throwing a party, I would (a) ask how I can help and (b) offer to help clean after.

Most people thought OP was in the wrong.

This person says your party = your cleanup.

Unless there was communication beforehand, this person agrees.

And this person has a good example to back up the YTA claim.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.