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Some patterns are impossible to ignore once you’ve watched them repeat enough times and one 20-year-old is staring down exactly that kind of pattern with her older sister.

Her sister has cycled through two separate living situations in a short span, first getting evicted from her own apartment and moving in with a family friend, then falling out with that friend and moving to another household that’s now also facing eviction due to unpaid rent.

But rather than taking accountability for the instability, her sister’s response was to call and ask her to take in her son for “a few weeks” while she and her boyfriend figure things out.

Having just moved into her first apartment less than three weeks earlier, she’s left recognizing a troubling cycle where her sister repeatedly creates chaos and expects everyone else to absorb the consequences.

Keep reading for the full story.

AITA for not wanting to take in my nephew

My (20F) sister (25F), we’ll call her H, has always been the entitled type, and by entitled I mean she always expects the people around her to drop everything in an instant to help her when something dramatic happens in her life.

So when she went through a big life change, she expected a lot of support from the people around her.

A little while back she and her boyfriend (21M) got evicted from their apartment and moved in with a close family friend who had been more than helpful given her situation.

She ended up having an issue with the family friend and moved out of there and in with another family friend.

It wasn’t long before she needed another place to stay.

Fast forward to a couple of days ago, she called me and told me that the family friend they had recently moved in with was so far behind on their rent payments that they were getting evicted, and everyone now has to find a place to stay.

So that’s when her sister came to her with a big request.

She then proceeded to tell me that she needs me to take my nephew for a few weeks until they can get back on their feet.

Now, I told H that I would think it over and that I’ll get back with her on that.

But once she thought about it, she started to feel like she was enabling her sister to continue in a destructive pattern.

While weighing the pros and cons of the situation, I realized that it’s becoming a pattern where H sets herself up for failure and expects the people around her to pick up the pieces.

I’m 20, I have no kids, and I recently just moved into my very first apartment 19 days after my 20th birthday, and becoming a mom overnight was not on my bucket list.

She doesn’t trust her sister to follow through with her word.

NOW: I DO NOT MIND TAKING MY NEPHEW, however I know my sister, and a “few weeks” would turn into a few months and then a few years. I feel like I’m being selfish, but at the same time some things you need to go through in order to get through it.

So AITA for not wanting to keep my nephew?

This is a tough one.

Redditors chime in with their takes.

Sometimes you just have to protect your peace.

It’s hard to think about how her nephew is being impacted by her sister’s irresponsible behavior.

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Her sister is asking a lot of her, and she really needs to be fully on board if she were to accept.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a friend who is upset they missed out on cheap festival passes due to her pal’s indecision.

Her sister’s lack of planning shouldn’t constitute an emergency for her.

Watching her older sister cycle through eviction after eviction without ever changing course makes it pretty clear this isn’t bad luck catching up with her. It’s a pattern her sibling doesn’t have the maturity to actually face.

If this were truly an emergency, this woman would likely happily accept. But she knows her sister better than anyone else — which means she’s painfully aware of the fact that her sister can’t really be trusted.

Sometimes you just have to look after your own peace, even when it’s hard.

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Author

Benjamin Cottrell

Benjamin Cottrell | Assistant Editor, Internet Culture

Benjamin Cottrell is an Assistant Editor and contributing writer at TwistedSifter, specializing in internet culture, viral social dynamics, and the moral complexities of online communities. He brings a highly analytical, editorial voice to his reporting on workplace conflicts, malicious compliance, and interpersonal drama, with a specific focus on nuanced stories that lack an obvious villain.

As a published author of rhetorical criticism, Benjamin leverages his academic background in human communication to dissect and elevate viral social media threads. Instead of simply summarizing events, he provides readers with balanced, deep-dive commentary into why the internet reacts the way it does. In addition to his cultural reporting, he is an experienced fine art photography essayist and video game reviewer.

When he isn’t analyzing the latest viral debates, Benjamin is usually chipping away at his extensive video game backlog, hunting down the best new restaurants, or out exploring the city with a camera in hand.

Connect with Benjamin on Instagram and read more of his essays on Substack.