She Sent Her 10-Year-Old to School with a 101°F Fever a Decade Ago—Now Her Adult Daughter Is Using That Day to Classify Her Entire Childhood as “Abusive”
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Parenting is difficult in many ways, especially since you really have to just do the best you can with limited knowledge or experience.
What would you do if your adult daughter said that you were a jerk because decades ago, you made her go to school while she was sick?
That is what happened to the mother in this story, and while she acknowledges that she was sicker than she knew at the time, she doesn’t think that makes her a bad parent.
I agree with the mother. She was just doing the best she can, and the daughter should get over it. Check out the full story below and see what you think.
AITA for sending my daughter to school?
I’m having a bit of a situation with my daughter at the moment.
Ok, let’s see what happened.
Before I go into the story, I need to stress that the initial incident took place years ago in the UK, not in the states.
Now that’s out the way, my (61f) daughter (29f) were having a chat about when she was a kid and the topic of school came up.
Being sick around Christmas is never fun.
Well, there was this one time around Christmas time that my daughter was really sick.
She ended up having this nasty stomach bug and had the last two weeks of term off before the Christmas holidays. If I remember correctly she was in year 5 or 6.
Kids often try to get out of going to school.
When she first said she wasn’t feeling, well I brushed it off, thinking she was nervous for Christmas play that night. Obviously, I was wrong and I got a call later that day to pick her up.
Turns out, my daughter remembers that day clearly. She doesn’t remember much after that, but she remembers that day.
This must have been a horrible experience for her.
She laid into me saying I shouldn’t have sent her to school. That she spent the whole of morning classes in tears because her head hurt so much.
Apparently she remembers not being able to do the work because she couldn’t think properly and that a guy she sat near said the work wasn’t too hard.
As a parent, you just do the best you can. And you make a lot of mistakes along the way.
Her teacher didn’t even try to help. It wasn’t until she threw up in the playground that they actually did something. I honestly don’t know if any of that is true, but she says it is.
She seems to think that because she already suffered with migraines at that time that I should have let her have the day off as a precaution anyway since “it’s not like I pulled a sickie often as a kid mum.”
Kids seem to remember every mistake a parent makes.
And “oh yeah I’m suddenly going to get nervous on the third show” (of the Christmas play). She also remembers the class test and doctor mentioning the big M. Of course she didn’t know what it meant back then but now she does.
She really thinks that I was a jerk to send her into school. I mean maybe I was considering she was generally good when she younger.
WITAH?
Mom seems to admit that she was wrong, but that doesn’t mean that she was an AH. Parents have to make decisions based on the situation at hand, not based on information they won’t have until later in the day. Her daughter needs to get over it.
Read on to see what the people in the comments have to say about it.
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There is always a reason to doubt kids.
All parents make mistakes.
Here is someone who seems to think that no memories from childhood can be inaccurate.
This person says Mom was out of line for dismissing her symptoms, but that seems harsh.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman who refuses to change her 4th of July traditions for her in-laws, sparking a family feud.
There is no way to know what will become a ‘core memory’ for a kid.
Mom made a mistake, so she should apologize. That does not mean that she was a jerk or a bad parent, though.
At this point, the daughter just needs to get over it, though.
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