They Flew In to Help His Sister With Her Newborn for Three Weeks. After She Insulted His Wife, They Left a Week Early
Helping family through a major life change can be rewarding and make you get closer, but even the best intentions can fall apart when expectations are too high.
In this case, a man and his wife agreed to spend three weeks helping his sister and her family after she welcomed her second child.
They flew in, ready to pitch in with childcare and housework, despite having plenty of stress of their own.
But they did not get thanks.
The longer they stayed, the more it seemed that nothing they did was right or good enough.
After his sister insulted his wife, they decided to leave.
Now he’s wondering if leaving before three weeks like they had agreed on was the wrong decision.
Read the full story below.
AITAH: I agreed to help my sister for 3 weeks with her kids, but I left after 2 weeks
My sister just gave birth to her second child a month ago.
She asked me and my wife to fly and stay at their home for 3 weeks to help with childcare and chores while she recovered and got used to being a mom of 2.
I work from home and my wife does not work, so I reluctantly agreed.
I was reluctant because I am going through a stressful period at work and my wife and I are on a break from trying to have our first baby after 3 unsuccessful tries last year.
I agreed because she seemed really anxious and has a BTS concert to go to soon (she needs someone to help her husband with the kids while she flies out to see the concert and fly back the next day).
There were signs of what was about to happen…
She and her husband are currently on parental leave for the next couple months.
Even before my wife and I got to their house, she was texting me about how frustrated she was with her mother in law and my parents who were there before us because she expected them to do some chores.
My sister complained about how she and her husband weren’t getting any rest at all since they had to “pick up the slack” on chores.
I assured her we would do our best to help with chores and kids.
My nightmare began as soon as we arrived. First, I didn’t realize they wouldn’t pick us up from the airport.
It was awkward to say the least.
They covered our plane tickets but we had to cover the $50 Uber from the airport to their house.
When we arrived, she asked us to do our own groceries so we would have our own food because they prepared special food to sustain her breast milk production and she didn’t want us to eat it.
When we started to cook our own food each day, she appeared annoyed at us and later on I found out that it’s because she expected us to ask her first if she and her husband needed anything before we “started doing our own thing”.
Because we had to do our own groceries, their fridge got full and she complained about the fridge being full even though 98% of it was their food.
They certainly didn’t feel appreciated.
My wife and I did all the chores each day, making sure their house was tidy every night, but my sister still was not pleased.
We spent all day with her 4 year old but my sister was constantly correcting my wife and I in how we interact with her 4 year old asking us not to reprimand her kid even when her kid was hitting us and saying some pretty mean things since she wanted her mom only.
The kid disliked my wife so much that she lied to my sister that my wife punched her (she did not), and my sister confronted us about it.
It was a hostile environment at that point.
My sister told me that it was okay if we wanted to leave early because our presence created more stress for them than relief, so after 2 weeks I decided for us to leave a week early because the situation felt like slavery.
My sister has sent me text messages after we left telling me how she doesn’t think my wife is good enough for me (because my wife apparently can’t do chores, wants too many breaks during the day from childcare and can’t take care of kids).
Also that there is something wrong with my wife since her 4 year old doesn’t like her.
It was almost traumatizing for them.
I responded and gave her my opinions about her insane expectations on free help (she was so insistent on exactly how everything needed to be done that I had nightmares) and that I don’t need her opinion about my marriage.
She messaged me again telling me that I always twist everything and I’m acting like the victim here, and that I’m never there for her.
I have not responded to her since her last message that was very hurtful.
AITA?
I don’t see how he and his wife did anything wrong.
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But what did Reddit think?
Someone shares their take on it.
I hadn’t thought about this. True.
I agree.
Stressful to be around.
Another reader chimes in.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a brother who is upset his parents bought his recovering sister a brand-new car but wouldn’t help him out with a used one.
I agree.
It’s understandable that his sister wanted extra help and even a break to have some fun, but the way she treated them was absurd.
The couple paid for their own groceries, handled daily chores, and spent their days looking after a young child while trying to follow a long list of expectations. In the meantime, it seems they were doing everything wrong.
Simply put, she took their presence and help for granted and thought it was okay to disrespect them.
She also made personal attacks against his wife when she was there helping her.
Now she can either apologize or keep doubling down until they are no longer comfortable visiting each other or even talking.
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