A Retiree Declined To Lead Her Art Guild While Her Husband Was In Poor Health, But She Wondered If She Was Wrong To Put Her Own Limits First
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Saying no is easy in theory, but much harder in practice.
One retiree had spent decades leading committees, teaching Sunday school, and training new staff at work and at church. Now she wanted to enjoy her art hobby without the pressure.
She joined a large art guild less than two years ago, and she was happy just showing her work, attending meetings, and encouraging other members.
Then someone asked if she’d consider becoming vice president.
She explained that she’s introverted, has a husband whose health can pull her away at a moment’s notice, and doesn’t want the responsibility. The guild suggested they try again in a year.
Now she wonders if she’s selfish for honoring her limits.
Keep reading for the full story.
AITA if I don’t want to be on any more committees.?
I am almost 70 years old. I was just approached by someone asking me if I’d consider being vice president of an art guild that I am a member of.
She can see why she would be asked, but she isn’t so sure she wants to comply.
I am skilled in this art form, and now that I’ve been retired, I spend a lot of time, energy, supplies, and selling, etc., on my hobby.
However, I am a new member of this rather large guild and don’t even know people well. It is professionally run, has annual membership fees and bylaws. I’ve been attending and held membership for less than 2 years!
I explained my hesitation, and it turned into “How about we approach this again in another year?”
This woman is no stranger to getting involved in her community.
The thing is, I’ve been on committees, panels, mentored, and delegated for decades. Not only in my profession, but at my church. I was on the education team, taught Sunday School, led Summer Bible school, and oriented various positions.
She would prefer to just show up without all the pressure.
What I really want to do is simply participate. I am more introverted than outgoing and leading, and delegating and teaching were always a challenge. I enjoy showing my work, attending the meetings, and encouraging others, but not having the responsibility of leading.
For her, it’s come with getting older.
I’m not as good at multitasking as I used to be. I’m afraid of new technology and am getting a bit more forgetful as time goes by. My husband has health issues, which can be a distraction to daily obligations at a moment’s notice.
AITA for saying “no” to taking this responsibility and making others fill this role?
Sounds like her objections are completely valid.
What did Reddit have to say?
Why not just be as honest as possible?
It sounds like this woman has done more than enough.
Short, sweet and to the point would be best.
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If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a bride who invites her groom’s “best woman” out to dinner in order to get to the bottom of her true feelings for her future husband.
It’s an honor to be asked, but she still needs to do what’s best for her.
Nobody who has taught Sunday school, sat on committees, and mentored staff for decades owes a brand-new art guild a leadership role. She’s already done her time.
This woman was tactful, but still honest. She had a lot going on in her life, and she didn’t need yet another thing to add to it.
Someone else will inevitably step up, and she’ll be able to enjoy simply being a member when it’s convenient for her.
At the end of the day, she’s earned the right to do whatever she wants with her retirement.
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