She Waited A Few Days After Giving Birth To Invite Visitors, And Her Husband’s Great-Grandma Was Miffed They Weren’t Invited Sooner
by Michael Levanduski
Having a new baby is an exciting time not just for mom and dad, but for the whole extended family.
Sometimes, however, grandparents and other family members can get upset if you don’t have them over to see the little one quickly enough.
That is what the mother in this story experienced, and she isn’t sure if she is wrong for her reaction.
Check out the details.
AITA for taking care of myself early postpartum instead of catering to my in-laws
I recently had my first baby.
Not only was the pregnancy difficult, but postpartum has been trying as well.
I’ve had issues healing from my c-section, in addition to mentally having a hard time.
Sometimes accepting help from others is difficult.
Family and friends are very sweet and have offered to come over and help, but I’m not the type of person who asks for help.
I tend to self isolate and get through it on my own, probably from childhood trauma forcing me to be independent at a very young age.
I don’t like to burden other people if I don’t have to.
My husband and I were at a point where we were ready to invite immediate family and grandparents over to host.
That is weird.
When we called my husband’s grandparents, they were very short with us about the invitation and declined to come over.
We were very confused about their tone, but figured they had something else bugging them.
After a couple of days, the conversation still felt weird, so we called them again to check in with them.
My grandmother-in-law was again, short with my husband.
He asked her if something was wrong and she unleashed.
She was hurt by not seeing us sooner.
People don’t have to do things the way she did.
She thinks it’s odd that we’ve “been keeping her great granddaughter from family” because back when she had kids, she was surrounded by family early postpartum.
She said she doesn’t even feel like a great grandmother and doesn’t even believe that her great granddaughter exists.
We were both shocked and in disbelief by her comments.
If she already met the baby once, that makes her reaction even odder.
Communication is a two way street and we hadn’t heard from her at all since she had met baby in the hospital.
It feels hurtful that we have just been trying to stay afloat the first couple of weeks and are now being accused of keeping our daughter from her.
I could understand her frustration IF we had been blowing her off, but that is not the case.
I thought people were supposed to give grace to new parents.
She should forgive them for their weird attitude, but know that it isn’t her fault.
Due to my isolating tendencies, I want to distance myself even more and not have to waste my energy on toxic family members, however I know that life is short and it wouldn’t be fair to my daughter, or husband.
Should I have reached out to them sooner?
AITA?
The great-grandparents need to understand not everything is like it was for them.
Let’s take a look at the comments.
She is undoubtedly exhausted.
Yeah, they are just pouting now.
Why would a new mom want to entertain?
Recovery is important.
Things are done differently.
She needs to focus on herself and the baby, not worry about great-grandma.
Seriously, why are people so entitled.
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