Some relationships just aren’t healthy, but it’s hard to change that when you disagree with someone about that.

The mother-daughter relationship in this story is the perfect example.

See what’s going on between them.

AITA for telling my mom i don’t want to hear her complain

I love my mom.

Just wanted to get that out there.

But a lot of the conversations we have are centered around her negative experiences or complaints about other people.

For example, “Your dad is so reckless, insert terrible baseless thing about your dad blah blah blah” (my parents are separated).

It’s baggage central.

I love my dad, so this is difficult to hear.

Another example is when she talks about her financial/job/interpersonal struggles.

I do not have the emotional capacity to comfort her and provide her with solutions while still learning how to deal with my own emotional struggles.

But I understand that because she has very little (if any) close friendships that my sister and I are the only people she can really talk to about these things.

And the baggage keeps getting heavier.

Recently we had a huge argument over this and I told her I would appreciate it if she didn’t talk to me about these things, especially her complaints about people I love.

She made it seem like I didn’t want to hear her talk about anything negative at all, and that I was ungrateful for all she does for me (paraphrasing).

AITA for telling her I don’t want to listen to her complain?

Here is what folks are saying.

It’s so childish and manipulative!

Boundaries are important.

I don’t understand why people find boundaries a hard concept.

Well said! You need to put your foot down.

Aw. I’m sure it stays with you.

Trying to pit your kid against their other partner is messed up.

No matter how old they are.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.