There is very little more painful than unrequited love. Particularly if you’ve liked that person for a long time. Particularly if you’ve pined over them. Particularly if they reject you in a spectacular fashion. No wonder it’s the subject of countless books, movies, and TV shows – because we all love a bit of ‘will they, won’t they?’ and we all have an opinion on whether Ross and Rachel were on a break.

In real life though, it’s tough when you find out that the person you’re in love with – or even infatuated with – doesn’t feel the same way. But there is one way to approach such a revelation, and one way only. To accept it. That doesn’t mean you can’t wallow or pine a little longer, but it’s important that you accept the person’s choices, especially if you want to maintain a friendship down the line.

But the guy in this story had a very different approach. From saying mean things about his crush’s current boyfriend to guilt-tripping her for not wanting to be with him, this story is a masterclass in how not to deal with the rejection of someone explaining that they just want to stay friends.

Read on to find out more.

I told my friend why I don’t want to date him, and our friends are saying I broke him, AITA?

I am a 21-year-old woman, with a friend of ten years who we’ll call ‘Mark’ (23, male).

Yesterday, Mark called me and asked me to meet him for lunch, saying that he had something important to discuss with me. I had free time so I agreed.

We had lunch then we talked a bit about random things. Then he cleared his throat and started speaking.

He first told me that he “didn’t understand why I was dating my now boyfriend when he’s a better match for me.”

Yikes! Let’s see how she responded to that.

I asked him to explain, and he basically went on about how he liked me first and he met me first, he’s more good looking, knows me better, he’s taller than my boyfriend and more successful.

This is not true. My boyfriend works aside from growing up in wealth, while Mark’s entire life is funded by his parents’ money

He told me he doesn’t understand how I can be with my boyfriend, when he’s always been around waiting for me.

I was out of words and asked him if he wanted me to be honest, to which he said yes.

So she was just that – and he really didn’t like it.

I told him that I would never want to date him given how I’ve seen the way he treated his past girlfriends. He ghosts them when he feels like it, and just expects them to be there waiting.

I told him he’s too immature and irresponsible for me, and that dating him would be exhausting.

I also explained that the reasons I mentioned was why over time I had started putting a distance to our friendship, because I didn’t like the way he treated the women in his life.

When I was done he was just quiet, he just excused himself and left. Meanwhile, I went home and went about my day.

But this wasn’t the end of the situation.

Later in the evening, our other friends started asking what I did to Mark, and that he’s been a wreck since he met me for lunch.

Apparently he was drinking and not telling anyone what happened.

I explained to them what happened and they are saying I was harsh, and that I broke him – but I think someone had to tell him the truth.

AITA?

Wow. Mark really didn’t make a good case for himself being this woman’s boyfriend, did he?

Being proud of your attributes is one thing, but going full comparison with the boyfriend she already has is far from a romantic gesture. It might work for guys in movies, but in real life it’s more likely to create hostility.

And if Mark truly treats his girlfriends so poorly, then this woman is right; he needed a wake-up call.

If you enjoyed this post, check out this post about a woman who reports her creepy coworker to HR after he calls himself her “work uncle” and leaves his number.

Let’s see what the Reddit community made of this.

This person agreed that slandering her current boyfriend was the worst way to proposition her.

While others thought that the situation simply showed him for who he was, and he didn’t like it.

Meanwhile, this Redditor thought that Mark needed to do some growing up, pronto.

Repeat after me, ladies: you do not owe men anything.

In society, this can seem quite confusing. After all, we’re brought up to be giving and thoughtful, and attentive to others’ needs ahead of our own. But if you put those benevolent notions into this context, it becomes almost prehistoric in its notions of gender roles. Because man or woman, you don’t exist to please others – you only have one life on this planet, and your only responsibility is to live your own life the best way you know how.

Fortunately, the woman in this story was quite aware of this, and refused to let Mark get away with behaving so appallingly. And quite rightly so, thanks to her steadfast boundaries. She’d pulled away from Mark because of the way he treated women, and she wasn’t about to let that distance slide now, much less relent and become his girlfriend. Shame on her friends for guilt-tripping her for ‘breaking’ him, when all she really did was bruise his oversized ego.

He said he wanted honesty? Well, he got it alright – and in abundance.