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Independence loses its shine quickly when everyone else treats it as a new family service.

This 24-year-old spent three years saving for a used car while working full time and taking night classes.

Now her mother and older sister assign errands without asking, then have the gall to call her selfish whenever work or school come first.

Read on for the full story.

AITA for refusing to be the “family driver” now that I have a car ?

I (24F) just got my first car a few months ago.

I saved for it for almost 3 years while working full time and taking night classes.

It’s nothing fancy, an old used Toyota, but it’s mine. I bought it myself, and I’m really proud of that.

This woman was expected to be available to drive everyone in the family.

The issue is this:

Since I got the car, my mom and older sister has started expecting me to drive everyone everywhere.

Groceries, pharmacy runs, appointments, airport pickups, random errands.

Sometimes they ask, but more often they just assume I’ll do it.

I get texts like, “You can take me at 3, right?” without even checking if I’m available.

Her mom and sister don’t drive, so they rely on her for transport.

My sister (29F) doesn’t work and doesn’t drive. She’s never really tried. She says driving makes her anxious.

Our mom doesn’t drive either for medical reasons.

For the past 10 years, they’ve relied on public transport, taxis, or friends, but now that I have a car, they act like I’m their personal chauffeur.

She tried setting boundaries, but they get upset when she says no.

I’ve tried setting boundaries.

I’ve told them I’m happy to help when I can, but I can’t always be available, especially since I still work full time and I’m trying to finish my degree.

But when I say no, they get super upset.

My sister sulks and complains I’m selfish.

My mom says things like, “We’ve always helped you when you needed it.”

Her sister blamed her for missing a job interview.

Last week, I refused to drive my sister across town for a job interview because I had an exam that evening.

She ended up missing it and now blames me for “ruining her chance.”

Our aunt even called to tell me I should “sacrifice a little” because “family helps family.”

I feel awful, but also kind of resentful.

Now, she’s wondering if she’s the bad guy in this situation.

I bought this car so I could be more independent. Not so I could become the default ride for two grown adults who’ve chosen not to drive.

But maybe I’m being too rigid.

AITA for refusing to be the family driver, even though I’m the only one with a car?

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Just because she has a car shouldn’t mean she has to be the family driver.

Let’s see how others react to this story on Reddit.

This user shares their personal thoughts.

Here’s a similar comment from this person.

This person gives their honest opinion.

This person is calling on the aunt to help them out.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a brother who doesn’t want to help his sister cover their aging father’s groceries.

Finally, short and simple.

This young woman was right to reject permanent chauffeur duty while balancing employment, classes, and her own responsibilities.

Her sister was responsible for arranging transportation to the interview, while the family needed to request occasional help instead of scheduling her availability.

They celebrated her independence by immediately trying to carpool onto it.

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Author

Chris Allen