Teenager Has A Joint Bank Account With His Mom, But He Wants An Account At A Different Bank Since His Mom Keeps Taking His Money

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When a child gets their first bank account, it makes sense to have a parent on the account who can transfer, deposit and withdraw money on behalf of the child, but when the child becomes a teenager and later an adult, it stops making sense to have the parent on the account.
In this story, one young man has a joint bank account with his mom, and his mom has taken quite a bit of money out of his account. Now, he wants a bank account at a completely different bank, and he doesn’t even want his mom to know about it.
Is that the best way to handle this situation? Let’s read the whole story to decide.
AITA for seeking a new bank account without telling my mom after a significant loss of money?
A couple of years ago, I (19M) received around $7,000 from my grandmother. I was looking to start college soon, and she wanted to put me in the right direction.
I didn’t work during high school, because my parents wanted me to focus on school (which paid off, as I graduated valedictorian of my class.)
Because of this, I never had access to my personal bank accounts.
When I had enough cash and checks that I wanted to deposit, my mom (49F) would just deposit it into a joint savings account that she said belonged to me.
Eventually, he needed his own account.
Fast forward a year later and I am ready to open a checking account to pay for my own things.
My mom comes with me and proposes to the bank employee that we just keep the joint savings account like it is.
The employee obliges, and I finally have my own checking account.
I check the savings account and I have only $1,000 in it.
Uh-oh!
My mom would often tell me that she needed to dip into it a little and she would pay me back, so I would always let her.
I had no idea it was this low.
A few months later, my beloved old 1999 Mercury Grand Marquis broke down for the last time.
His family offered to help him buy a car.
My mom’s side of the family was very pushy about the idea of getting a new car. I was not, but I finally caved when I was told I wouldn’t have to pay the full monthly payments (which came out to around $900 per month.)
My grandmother (dad’s mom) and my dad gave me another generous sum of around $7,500 to get me started, and my granny and pops (mom’s parents) put around $3,000 down on the car.
This month, I was informed by my granny and pops that the money from my grandmother and dad had run out, and I would need to start paying some again.
It can be hard to find a job.
I’ve been religiously searching for a job, combing all sorts of boards daily and getting plenty of interviews.
However, because I didn’t work in high school I’ve found no luck.
I’ve been doordashing, but aside from that I have no source of income.
My refund from college financial aid came back recently, to the tune of about $2,000.
He wants to spend some of that money on something besides his car.
I want to treat the love of my life to a lovely Valentine’s Day, so I set some money aside for daily use and had planned to transfer some more for my V-Day plans.
I knew i would need a large amount because of my plans, but I didn’t see it as exorbitant.
I had to ask my mom for permission to use any of the money, because she immediately put an embargo on my usage of my own refund, saying it needed to be put toward the car.
I transferred $200 out for early shopping and going on dates before V-Day.
His mom is not to be trusted.
I checked my banking a few days ago, and all but $50 was gone from my account.
I called and asked, and my mom told me that I needed to listen to her, that her word was final, and that I could not be trusted with my own money.
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She blew up at me for moving to live with my dad (long story) and implied that I needed to pay all $900 per month.
So, AITA for seeking a different bank?
This joint bank account is a huge problem. His mom is stealing his money and then trying to make him feel like he’s the irresponsible one.
Let’s see how Reddit responded.
This is good advice.

It is a really expensive car payment, especially for a teenager.

Another person knows the mom should not have access to his money.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about an incoming college student who does not want to share their grandparents’ monetary gift with a medically complex sibling.
Everyone knows he needs his own bank account.

His mom has been stealing from him. That’s completely unacceptable. He really should ask the bank for a list of transactions so that he can see how much money she actually stole through the years. It’s also too bad he’s stuck with such a huge car payment when he didn’t even want a brand new car. His family has failed him.
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