I know that we’d all like to get at least one more wear out of our wedding gowns, but let’s face it – they’re meant to be worn only once, and pulling it out of the closet to try to upstage someone else on their big day doesn’t seem like a great look.

That’s exactly the situation OP finds themselves in, as his wife – who does not get along with his cousin’s fiancee in the first place – wants to wear her (non-traditional) gown to the wedding.

(we’re both 25 by the way)

My wife Amy and I got married a few months ago. My cousin Sam is getting married early next year to his fiancee Jane. Amy and Jane don’t get along too well, they’re fine in family events and stuff but they don’t run in the same circles otherwise. Amy’s mentioned before that Jane doesn’t want to be a part of their group and she’s too shy.

Amy saw what Jane’s dress looks like, from another cousin. I haven’t seen it but it’s custom made, white and gold, and she thinks it’s too much. The issue now is that Amy’s come up with the idea to wear her wedding dress to Sam and Jane’s wedding. She said she doesn’t have time to go dress shopping, and her dress isn’t traditional white (it’s pink).

They have been arguing about it, but she doesn’t see the issue since her gown isn’t white, she “doesn’t have time to go shopping,” and doesn’t think her dress should go to waste.

I said no, she can’t wear her wedding dress to someone else’s wedding, but she’s insisting. I told her if she insists on wearing this dress, she doesn’t have to attend.

Amy got really upset and said I’m trying to control her, and her dress should be reused instead of sitting in the closet.

She’s accusing him of trying to control her, and at least one of her friends says he has no right to tell her she can’t attend if she won’t wear a different dress.

This has blown up, and I just don’t think you should wear your wedding dress to another wedding, regardless of if it’s white or not? I don’t think I’m the AH but Amy is mad, she told her friend and the friend also said I can’t tell her if she attends or not.

What does Reddit think about it? Let’s find out!

The top comment says this really shouldn’t even be a discussion.

People have a lot of very interesting ideas on how he should handle this.

This person says this could be indicative of a bigger issue in their relationship, really.

Sometimes you don’t know who you married until it’s too late.

“You can’t sit with us!”

This one is pretty bizarre, but also fairly cut and dried.

Just say no.