It can seem like the world is all about “vibes” these days. Lifestyles are vibes, aesthetics are vibes, and when it comes to other people, you’d best believe you should pay attention to the bad vibes as much as the good.

If you’re wondering if you’re missing out on some red flag behavior, here are 15 things people say are dead giveaways as far as reasons to give someone a wide berth.

15. The confidence in his approach.

When they try to diffuse the situation instead of talking s*%t.

The key to this one is confidence in their approach. If someone can calmly collect themselves to diffuse a situation, it means they’d prefer not to scuffle, but in a way that insinuates that they aren’t worried about the outcome of that scenario.

14. You need eyes on the back of your head.

There’s all different kinds of people you shouldn’t f**k with.

Most people here are describing people who will kick your ass in a fight, but the theres also people who will set your house on fire in the dead of night, or people who will make up the worlds s*%ttiest rumors about you and get everybody to believe it.

13. The way they carry themselves.

There’s just a way that some people carry themselves. As a tiny nerd in 8th grade I accidentally became friends with a 7th grader from a very rough background.

That was the moment I stopped being bullied, and my buddy genuinely never did a thing. I knew he was involved in some horrific violence, but in the time we spent together, he never put his hands on anyone.

Basically the moment he turned to the offending person and assumed *that* posture and *that* stare, the argument was over. So I remembered that for ever, and now whenever I see people carry themselves like that I assume they’re hardcore.

12. Just play nice.

If you can’t tell by looking, it’s best not to f**k with anyone.

ETA- I had absolutely no idea this would get 8k upvotes lol. All I meant by what I said is that 1- it’s normally best not to f**k with anyone and 2- if you’re thinking of f**king with someone and you don’t know the signs that they shouldn’t be f**ked with, walk away lol.

11. You just know.

There’s just a “look”.

A huge, and I mean HUGE percentage of our brainpower is devoted to subconsciously assessing threats. A lot more than conscious thought. It’s all “instinct” and “gut feel”.

It blew my mind as a bullied nerdy kid, that just a few months of karate was enough for everyone to leave me alone.

No-one even knew I did karate. It wasn’t even a very practical style. But hours of training moves was enough to make some subtle change in my posture/physique/attitude/something that people subconsciously recognised and were instinctively wary of.

10. Skinny little wrists.

I worked in an inpatient psych hospital for 5 years. The people I feared the most were average build 20-35 year old white dudes coming down off of meth induced psychosis.

They were always wirey, they didn’t feel pain, they had no regard for your safety and a ton of energy. My worst nightmare to restrain.

Skinny little wrists would always get out of the straps. There was no reasoning with them.

9. If you know, you know.

Cauliflower ear

Or a necklace made of cauliflower ears

8. Nobody home.

1000 yard/ disassociated stare. Especially when in a confrontation. That person is not all there and when they go they will GO.

7. Grandpa knows best.

One of the best pieces of advice my grandpa ever gave me is “Don’t pick fights with old men with thick necks, girls who grew up with brothers, or little guys with messed up ears. And if you do, always stop and ask yourself ‘Exactly how crazy is this sonofabitch?’”

Doing martial arts, and making the mistake of trying to tickle my wife early on in the relationship, taught me that all of those things are true.

6. We’ve all known that kid.

I remember that stare, a quiet kid in my grade school had it. No one bullied him, he was quiet and seemed to like being alone.

One year there was a new kid who joined our school and he was clearly THE bully in his last school. He immediately started picking on that quiet kid and we were all like “oh leave him alone he’s cool, just likes to be by himself”. The new kid kept picking on him till the quiet kid snapped and holy s*%t it was honestly terrifying at one point.

He wasn’t winning the whole time, I don’t even think he had fought before, but I could tell he would’ve used that metal compass tool from math class as a weapon if one were in hands reach.

Since then that disassociated stare always sticks out to me when I see it occasionally in random adults on the subway etc.

5. They’re looking for a fight.

The biggest giveaway for me has always been someone looking around in a situation where they are about to have to fight. A person in their face yelling or posturing at them, and they aren’t looking at that person at all. But are instead looking over them or around past them.

That is someone who is about to f**k another person up. If you are ever mad at someone, or shouting at someone, and they start looking past you, behind you, or to the sides, you are about to get f**ked up.

4. No reason, really.

Dude I used to work with who was absolutely massive got punched really hard once on a night out, unprovoked.

He simply looked at the dude, smiled a wide genuine grin & said “why would you do that man?”

The guy who hit him did not try for a second punch.

3. The checklist countdown.

It’s the checklist countdown –

Friend gonna defuse this? Nope.

Cop gonna stop this/tase me/shoot me? Nope.

Any bystanders who don’t look annoyed/might jump in to help? Nope.

Does this guy have friends who are waiting for a reaction? If yes, how dangerous will this fight be?

Then just waiting for it to escalate.

2. And I’m out.

I’ve watched this happen exactly once.

Friend of mine who could have absolutely pasted the guy punching him got hit with a hook to the jaw, didn’t even shift his feet or really his neck. Just sort of widened his eyes and was like “alright I’m out.”

It was a friend of ours who had had too much to drink, so he didn’t actually want to fight, but I know for a fact that he did multiple years of judo. Dude could have been put on or in the ground.

1. The little guy.

Never fuck with the small bouncer.

The big guys got hired because they’re big and intimidating. The little guy got hired because he’ll f**k you up.

I’m committing all of these to memory.

After all, you can’t be too careful.