July 20, 2023 at 9:43 pm

Why Are You Still Single? Here’s What People Had to Say.

by Matthew Gilligan

ARImSingle Why Are You Still Single? Here’s What People Had to Say.

I’ve been single for a long time and sometimes people ask me why.

And I’m not sure if I have a precise answer…maybe it’s a combination of a lot of things.

It is what it is, you know?

But these AskReddit users were pretty clear about why they’re living the single life.

Check out what they had to say below.

Ghosted.

“I keep getting ghosted.

I actually asked one of my matches that ghosted me what I could do better, since I just keep getting ghosted, and she told me it wasn’t me. She said I have a good profile, seem chill, had a good conversation, good compliments, but she told me most women aren’t actually looking for relationships on dating apps, they’re looking for validation.

That, or they’re too anxious to actually meet people irl. I was sure I was doing something wrong, so her telling me it wasn’t me made me feel a little better. Keep at it, we’ll both find someone who’s actually interested eventually!”

Not working out.

“I don’t know where to meet people, I am not good at talking to new people, I am shy and I can’t tell if someone is interested in me, and I don’t think I’d make a good partner so I don’t try very hard.”

Don’t care.

“It is ENTIRELY a “me” problem.

I’ve been told I have a good personality, I’m funny, handsome etc. But I just can’t bring myself to…..care?

I have an avoidant attachment style and find it hard to express my feelings properly so after the initial period people just get tired of me I guess.”

Clueless.

“My problem is noticing when I’m being flirted with.

Friends point it out after the fact but I just see it as being friendly and kind.”

Yup.

“Ugh…so many reasons.

But also the George Costanza curse: when I like them, they don’t like me.

When they like me, I don’t like them.”

In the friend zone.

I’ve never really been able to find someone that would want to marry me.

I’m that guy that women tell “I like you, but only as a friend.”

Oh, well…

“I wouldn’t mind being in a relationship.

I just can’t find a woman that I truly enjoy being around enough that has similar values to my own, within my limits of what I consider attractive, and wants a long term monogamous relationship.

Online dating has been terrible for me since I graduated college and hit my late 20s.

I’ve unfortunately had some unwarrantedly rude public rejections that still sting when they pop into my mind, and that pain really hampers from doing it again. I’m not ugly by any means and do take care of my appearance.

Oh well.”

Freedom!

“Freedom. Happiness. Time to myself.

Zero desire to compromise, argue, clean up after someone else, or put up with someone else.”

Focus on yourself.

“I’m currently in the process of learning to accept who I am after a rough past.

I’m focused on exploration and it would be selfish for me to try and be committed when I’m not there right now.”

At least you recognize it.

“I made the mistake of wearing my heart on my sleeve while I was a kid and now I’m paying for it by having no self worth outside of the value I have to others.

I don’t feel secure enough with myself to have a relationship because I could not give my all to someone else. And that’s not fair.”

That’s harsh.

“Ugly combined with having the personality of a brick.

Plus a single full time father who works constantly just to survive.

So no time, ugly and no personality.”

I do hope some of these folks find what they’re looking for.

Keep trying!