Don’t let your mouth write a check that your *** can’t cash!

Are you familiar with that term?

It means that you shouldn’t talk trash to someone if you can’t back it up…because that’s never a good thing.

And this story from Reddit’s “Malicious Compliance” page definitely has the vibe of that quote going on.

Check out what this guy had to say…

Don’t threaten me with a good time.

“A lot of lawyers are making the news with their bad decisions, which reminded me of a story I hope you enjoy.

I had an appearance for a pre-trial hearing in a small town court. This hearing went ‘ok’ for my client. The other attorney (opposing counsel or OC) did not react strongly positively or negatively which made sense, because the decision was basically a 60/40 split of what we were disputing. Neither of us was a big winner or loser.

This guy was looking for a fight.

His demeanor changed drastically after the judge dismissed us. In the hallway he stomped up to me while I was discussing next steps with my client and said we needed to talk. I said something along the lines of ‘as soon as I’m done with client’. OC huffed off, and I finished my talk.

To set the stage for this next part, I am almost exactly average for height/weight. OC was probably 4ish inches taller, 60ish lbs heavier, and 30ish years my senior. Imagine a big belly, drinker’s nose, and some flop sweat if he saw the elevator was out of service.

So I say goodbye to client and walked over. Without any small talk he gave me something close to ‘You think you can just walk in here and act like that?’. This was confusing because nothing really went great OR terrible for me OR him. So I said something like ‘act like what?’.

He made a threat.

This really set him off, and I pinky swear I was not trying to antagonize him with that question. OC then says, verbatim, “You better hope I never see you outside this court, because I will kick the **** out of you.”

What he did not know was that I really enjoy fighting. After seeing the Power Rangers punch those clay soldiers, I begged my parents for karate classes.

The guy who wrote this story knows what he’s doing.

After that was judo in HS, BJJ in college, and an attempt to fight in the UFC after college. I thought I was tough right up until actual professionals hit me. Then I thought “wow I’m actually a huge *****” and went for a graduate degree.

This was heating up!

So I told OC “Sounds good, we need to sign some forms first though. Here’s my availability, let’s find a time and meet at this gym. Do you want boxing or grappling gloves?”.

I thought for sure he would make up an excuse, BUT HE AGREED.

So we set up a time and everything.

But then…

The small town court gossip mill did its thing, and a couple of court staff showed up to watch the fight.

In an anticlimactic turn of events, OC was a no-call no-show.

The next time OC and I appeared before the judge (who did not show up to watch the fight), the judge made a snarky comment like ‘Is this really worth fighting over’. And OC didn’t have anything to say to that.”

Check out how folks reacted to this story.

This person had some thoughts about this.

Another individual nailed it.

This person stated the obvious.

And one Reddit user quoted Mike Tyson…

I bet that guy is pretty embarrassed about what went down.

What a jerk!

If you liked that post, check out this post about a rude customer who got exactly what they wanted in their pizza.