Woman Cancels A Visit With Her Mentally Unwell Sister, And Now Things Have Gone From Bad To Worse
by Addison Sartino
Family can be tough, especially when you love them but you don’t like them.
This woman took to Reddit to share her story.
About three years ago, my stepsister Daphne got pregnant. S
he and her husband Jim were thrilled, but found out at the 20 week scan that the baby had a congenital condition and would be born severely disabled.
Daphne decided to keep going with the pregnancy despite Jim’s protests and they split up, but got back together by the time their son Liam was born.
He is now 2 years old.
The woman’s sister has developed behavioral issues since giving birth.
Over the last two years, Daphne’s (and Jim’s) mental health has declined significantly.
Daphne used to be a positive and pleasant person, but now it’s impossible to have a conversation with her. She is malicious, envious, and flies off the handle at any perceived slight.
When I was having my child, I didn’t speak to her for most of the pregnancy because of how bitter and narcissistic she was.
We don’t live close to Daphne so rarely see her in person, but I heard she was getting worse from our parents.
In early November, Daphne had a mental breakdown. She trashed Liam’s room completely and vandalised Jim’s car in a fit of rage.
Thankfully, the sister is now in therapy.
This was enough to finally get her moved up the waiting list for mental health services and she started therapy.
She reached out to me during this time and we had a few conversations and I invited her and Jim to visit my husband and I for a vacation at our beach house in March.
Despite being in therapy, the sister can’t help but to still lash out at those around her.
Then we saw Daphne and Jim over Christmas and it was awful.
Daphne could keep herself in check for a couple of hours, but then she would revert back to her old self. She would swear constantly, and while I know Liam can’t understand her, I think swearing at kids isn’t okay.
Whenever I expressed concern for her she would just snap that I need to get off my high horse about having a “perfect” child. Jim was snapping at her constantly. He would also constantly ask to hold or play with my child, to the point it got annoying.
Overall, the whole Christmas break was just the whole family being anxious over the situation.
After the trip, the woman and her husband were too anxious to have her sister visit.
My husband finally said a week ago that he didn’t want Daphne and Jim visiting, and I agreed.
I called Daphne and said that something had come up with my husband’s work and we needed to cancel the trip.
Daphne was furious.
Apparently her therapist had been saying how good this break would be for her (they haven’t been on vacation since having Liam) and I owed her this one thing to help her.
Eventually she gave up and said I was a horrible person for pulling the rug out from under her and hung up.
Now the woman’s whole family is upset with her for cancelling the trip.
I feel bad if I’m derailing her recovery, and even my parents think I shouldn’t have cancelled, which is making me rethink things.
They saw how absolutely horrible she was to me over Christmas, they saw how obsessed Jim became with my child, and they still think I should have put that aside, and they’re not normally the “keep the peace” people, so maybe I really am in the wrong.
Reddit users were quick to side with the writer.
One person laid it out simply.
Another reader commented that the sister needs way more help than the woman could provide.
And this person reminded the writer that her mental health matters too!
Trust your gut and your boundaries.
If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.