May 18, 2024 at 6:49 pm

Her Sister-In-Law Complains That She’s Not Treated Like Family, But Her Fellow In-Laws Are Sick Of Her Whining And Tell Her To Cool It

by Ryan McCarthy

Source: Pexels/Reddit

Everyone wants their spouse’s parents to like them, its just the natural instinct for anyone in a relationship.

But sometimes no matter what you do, or how no matter how many flowers you buy for your mother in law, you just aren’t her cup of tea!

And that’s okay!

But when this woman’s sister-in-law kept complaining their mother-in-law liked someone else better than her, she finally had to put an end to the whining.

Was she in the wrong to put her foot down? Decide for yourself!

AITA for rolling my eyes at my husband’s SIL and telling her I’m tired of her whining?

One of my BILs “Joe” is married to “Jesse” who was his childhood best friend. Jesse was always like another son and brother in the family.

He’s known them basically his whole life and had a rough childhood with his biological family so my in laws basically adopted him.

He even lived with the family for a while.

Because of this Jesse was always included as a member of the family as a unit and not just as an in law.

Honestly Jesse is my mother in law’s favorite child lol, and I think he’s the favorite brother of the family.

She said she was perfectly aware and fine with this fact.

This was something I always knew.

My husband was upfront about it when we dated. I know the rest of his siblings have been upfront with partners as well.

I don’t take it personally that Jesse is treated like a son/brother in the family but I’m a daughter-in-law and sister-in-law.

It makes sense to me.

We don’t have the same long history where they watched me grow up and I never lived with my husband’s family.

But of her fellow in-laws did not have the same care-free attitude about Jesse’s treatment!

Another BIL “Frankie” is married to “Emma.”

Of all the fellow in-laws, Emma is the one who has a problem with Jesse being just another son/brother but us being more clearly in-laws.

She has complained about it to a number of us fellow in-laws. We’ve all explained that we’re cool with it because we get Jesse has grown up with the family.

Emma likes to vent to me a little more.

I asked her once why she married Frankie if she was so bothered by it when I know he told her.

But apparently Emma assumed that she would eventually reach Jesse’s level of closeness with the family!

She told me she had assumed that it was only at first and after a while everything was the very same.

That she didn’t really believe they called Jesse their son/brother and not son-in-law/brother-in-law.

And on she went whining about it.

She heard Jesse was written into the will alongside the children (I don’t know if that is true and I don’t really care) and she was so outraged.

It gets annoying. The others find it old too. Especially because she likes to get us alone to do this.

But at a celebration of Jesse and his husband’s birthday, she’d had had enough of Emma’s complaining.

It was Joe and Jesse’s birthday and everyone was celebrating and Emma decided to track me down to complain about it some more and she really sounded like a child.

I asked her to stop and she told me she needed to get it off her chest. I tried moving away but she walked and talked.

Then I rolled my eyes and she was like “Oh my god stop being such a jerk!” I told her I was tired of her whining.

She told me I should be more understanding and supportive and us unwanted in-laws need to stick together.

I don’t feel unwanted. I just know I’m not their daughter/sister.

She demanded an apology from me later that night.


Reddit was as over Emma as the poster was, and wanted to know if there was any actual differing treatment other than being called son or daughter.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Many thought Emma’s issue wasn’t with Jesse’s relation to the family, but with Jesse’s identity!

Source: Reddit/AITA

Others disagreed, saying the problem was that she couldn’t talk to her husband about these feelings.

Source: Reddit/AITA

And most people thought it was ridiculous that people cared so much about their in-laws affection in general.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Finally, this user thought she had exhausted this conversation with her husband, and that’s why she was hounding the poster about it.

Source: Reddit/AITA

She sounds absolutely exhausting to be around.

I would be avoiding her like the plague at family gatherings!

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