So, one couple decided to renovate their bathroom after water damage started turning their home into a moldy mess.

The thing is, she took on the heavy lifting while her husband, who has untreated ADHD, promised to handle the demolition.

But when it’s time to start, he suddenly wants to go climbing instead. Did that follow an an hour-long debate over priorities?

Yes. Yes it did.

AITA for telling my husband no he can’t go climbing and has to help with home reno first

My (36F) husband (38m) and I decided to renovate the bathroom because there was water damage from a toilet that had been leaking.

It was mostly my idea to renovate but not just for aesthetics, mold was growing at the bottom of the vanity, sheetrock, etc.

He agreed to renovate but really had very little interest in the process.

He has untreated ADHD and does not enjoy home maintenance (not speculation, he tells me this).

Not a good combo.

With that being said it became my job to apply for loans, search for contractors, schedule the contractors to come, etc.

It’s A LOT of mental work. I did it alone.

He did agree to save money and offered to demo the bathroom himself. I

was hesitant at first because he is not usually motivated to do things in the house and also due to the ADHD his timeline and processing speed is very slow and often time things don’t get down.

He promised me many times he wanted to do it.

I sent screenshots of the calendar and told him the days he would start. The whole week leading up to demo day I mentally prepare him.

This isn’t going to end well, is it?

We’ve been together for 21 years. I know how he is. He’ll say he forgot or it’ll seem like brand new information to him so every day he gets a reminder.

Fast forward to last night, the night before demo is to start he sends me a message asking if he can go climbing with his friends.

I said I’d prefer if he would just demo like we agreed. He only has 2 days off.

So I said no, sorry, you can’t go.

It turned into almost an hour argument back and forth about how the weather won’t be good the rest of the days and he can just do it then.

But I know him. He waits until the last minute and something may go wrong.

Riiiiisky.

We may need to call for extra help or something. I always have a sense of urgency and he has none and it makes my life very difficult.

To add, he has a job where he can often do his hobbies. He climbs with his work friends, goes hiking, skiing, etc.

When he has days off he goes for bike rides for hours.

He is absolutely not deprived of leisure time but I am. I have been home all summer (I’m a teacher) being responsible for my kids 90% of the time.

Being up with them in the morning, taking them out for activities all day, and putting them to sleep.

On top of that I have cleaned up after the kids and his messes every single day. I haven’t had a day of fun the entire summer. So I feel anger and resentment constantly.

Oof. That’ll do it.

Our fight ended with him telling me it makes no sense to tell him he has to start on this day, he’ll just do it the next day. I’m the one being unreasonable and everyone else will agree with him and not me.

Also, to add today is Thursday. Our tile guy comes in on Monday and the entire bathroom needs to be completely gutted by the morning.

Thank you! 🙏🏼

Clearly, she is exhausted and frustrated, and her husband’s laid-back attitude just isn’t cutting it

. Is she also right?

Reddit says yes.

This person has a solid suggestion.

This person knows what’s up.

This person offers an ultimatum.

Turns out, climbing wasn’t the only thing he was trying to dodge—responsibility’s a tougher hill to scale.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.