Helping out a friend when they’re out of work and struggling to pay the bills is a very nice thing to do, but when does kindness and generosity become enabling?

In today’s story, one woman explains that her best friend (who is also her roommate) has been helping pay for the expenses of another roommate who is currently out of work.

She thinks her friend is being too generous and needs to stop helping him out, but her friend thinks that’s the wrong attitude.

Let’s see how the story unfolds…

AITA for Refusing to Cover My Friend’s Rent After She’s Been Paying for Our Roommate’s Share for 2 Months?

Alright, here’s the deal: I (22F) have been living with my best friend (23F) and two other roommates for about a year now.

Everything started out fine, but it’s all gotten a bit messy lately.

One of our roommates (24M) lost his job about two months ago.

He’s still been looking for work, but he’s been getting by by asking my best friend to cover his portion of the rent and utilities.

She has a full-time job and could technically afford to do this for a while, but she’s still been asking me and the other roommate to help with our share of things too, as she can’t pay the full rent on her own.

She doesn’t think he’s trying hard enough to get a job.

I totally get that people go through tough times, and I get that he’s trying to find work—but here’s where it starts to feel off: He’s not really doing enough to help himself.

He’s been taking casual gigs here and there, but it’s not like he’s putting in the kind of effort needed to really get a stable job.

He’s been living off the generosity of my best friend, and honestly, it’s starting to feel like she’s enabling him rather than him actually trying to get his life together.

She told her best friend how she feels about the out of work roommate.

I’ve talked to her about it, and she says it’s not a big deal because he’s her friend, and she doesn’t mind helping him out.

But I told her that I’m not comfortable with her paying for someone’s rent who isn’t making enough of an effort to help themselves.

I also told her that I can’t keep carrying the extra weight if things don’t change, because I’m already struggling to make ends meet, too.

Last night, I told her that I’m done contributing to this situation.

If he doesn’t start pitching in for rent soon, then I think he should move out.

It’s not my responsibility to pick up the slack just because he’s a ‘friend’ of hers, especially if he’s not taking steps to improve his situation.

I told her that I can’t help her cover for someone who isn’t showing any signs of working toward a solution.

Her best friend thinks she is the one who is wrong.

She was devastated.

She said I was being cold-hearted and that I was being selfish.

She told me I’m acting like I don’t care about him and that true friends support each other, even when it’s hard.

Now, some of our mutual friends are backing her up, saying that I’m being too harsh and that I’m not being a good friend by not helping out.

She’s not sure if she’s right or wrong.

I’m really torn because I want to support my best friend, but I also don’t think it’s my responsibility to keep this going.

Am I being unreasonable?

AITA for not wanting to contribute to this situation anymore and telling him to move out if he doesn’t start paying his share?

It can be hard to judge how hard someone is really trying to find work.

He might actually be trying harder than she thinks, but at the same time, he can’t avoid paying rent forever.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story…

She should tell her friends to pay.

The out of work friend needs to start paying.

Surely the roommate can get hired somewhere, anywhere!

Her best friend needs to stop enabling the out of work roommate.

It’s not wrong to make sure you have enough money to cover your own bills.

You can’t help someone who won’t help themselves.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.