When a couple decides to move into separate houses, there are many things that need to be split up, including the pets.

What would you do if your boyfriend wanted to take one of your cats with him, but his new place was unfit for taking care of a cat?

That is the situation the young woman in this story is in, so she isn’t sure whether she refuse to let him take the cat or not.

Let’s read the whole story.

WIBTA for refusing to let my fiancé take our cat when we move?

My fiancé (28M) and I (26F) have been together for five years, living together for the last 2.5.

Our relationship has become an emotional dead zone—we haven’t been affectionate or intimate in a long time, and our home is a complete disaster because, honestly, we just weren’t ready to be on our own.

This couple needs to work on themselves.

We’ve both been struggling with our mental health, so we’ve decided to move back in with our parents, live separately for a while, and work on ourselves while still staying together.

We have two cats: Mocha (2F) and Coffee Bean (1.5M).

Coffee Bean is bonded to me, while Mocha is attached to my fiancé.

If it is her cat, she can choose what she wants.

Mocha was my first-ever pet because every animal I had growing up technically belonged to my mom.

Mocha was also my fiancé’s first pet since his parents were allergic.

We both love her deeply, but I don’t feel comfortable letting him take her when we move.

Yikes, it sounds like neither cats nor humans should live there.

Here’s why:

1. His mom’s house is filthy, soechis bedroom and the dining room. When his late mother (mom and mother yes) was diagnosed with dementia, his mom had to take care of her and the house has fallen into complete disarray. She hasn’t been able to get it back on track since her passing. His room is the worst of it. He goes over daily to clean, but according to him, the place is knee-deep in garbage, rotting food, spiders, and cockroaches. Not only does he not think he can get it done by the end of the month when our 30 day notice is up and needs me to hold on to her while he finishes his room, but she wont be able to roam the house freely and will be trapped in his room. I cannot in good conscience send Mocha into that environment.
2. He gets overwhelmed by Mocha wanting attention. When she wants to play or cuddle at a time he isn’t in the mood, he gets frustrated, yells at her, and brings her to me with her toy. She’ll run back to him because she loves him, but instead of engaging, he just gets more frustrated. When she begs for food, he goes into meltdown mode instead of just handling it like I do. He has to lock her out of the gaming room to eat sometimes.

She doesn’t have the same issues.

Meanwhile, I don’t have this issue with the cats. If they beg, I give them a tiny treat, and they move on. When Coffee Bean gets pushy, I play with him for five minutes, and then he chills.

I call him my “naughty snuggle buggle” while throwing his favorite toy, and once he’s gotten his energy out, I can go back to whatever I was doing.

The complication:

Technically, both cats are legally mine.

Their Banfield memberships and microchips are in my name.

This is very reasonable.

I don’t want to hurt my fiancé, and I know he loves Mocha, but I genuinely don’t think she will be safe or happy at his mom’s house.

When I brought this up, he got upset, and we had a fight.

Would I be the wrong if I refused to let him take Mocha?

WIBTA?

It doesn’t even seem like he likes the cats that much, why is he pushing to keep one? He definitely shouldn’t have Mocha.

Read on to see what the people in the comments have to say.

The boyfriend needs mental health help.

Looking at what the cats will want matters too.

This is all that really matters, they are legally hers.

This commenter says it is not humane or safe.

This person is also concerned for the fiancé.

The cats won’t be safe with him.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.