Divorce can make parenting extra tricky, especially when you have shared custody and one of the parents is remarried.

In today’s story, one mom is upset that her kids had bad attitudes about celebrating their stepdad’s birthday.

Their dad isn’t upset by this at all but wonders if his attitude about it is wrong.

Let’s read all the details.

AITA for not discipling my children for spoiling their new stepfather’s birthday?

I have two kids with my ex aged 14 and 12.

It’s been 10 years since my ex and I broke up and we’re not on the best of terms.

All communication is generally through an app unless speaking face to face which is rare.

She got married in August of last year.

Her husband’s birthday was last weekend, and according to her the day of she had a whole day together planned for her, him and the kids but the kids had rotten attitudes the whole day and spoiled his birthday dinner that night with his family.

The kids explained why they didn’t want to celebrate the stepdad’s birthday.

She claims they refused to wish him a happy birthday, tried to get out of spending the day with them and were sullen at dinner.

And when she talked to them about it on Sunday they told her they didn’t see why they had to celebrate her husband when she doesn’t ever want them to celebrate me.

That’s referring to the fact I always took my kids shopping for gifts for their mom for her birthday and for Mother’s Day.

I’d let them drop off the gifts on her birthday if I had them or I’d send them to their mom’s with the gifts if her birthday fell during her custody time.

The kids typically ask.

I know they have asked her to do the same for me and she refuses, which bothers them a lot.

His ex would rather not have the extra gifts and attention.

Ex has disliked me doing that.

She said it’s trying to make her look like a bad mom/parent because she won’t do the same for our kids.

That’s not the only problem.

There’s also bad blood surrounding the relationship with her husband and the kids.

She wanted them to keep it from me that she was dating someone but they didn’t.

That’s been a sticking point ever since too.

The kids don’t like him.

He doesn’t care how his kids acted at the party.

They mostly just ignore him but the birthday celebration made that difficult.

Add the fact she has said no to them when they asked for her help in getting stuff for me it’s all very messy and honestly?

I don’t care.

My kids didn’t do anything dangerous.

They also didn’t make a big scene.

For me it’s not great, but I’m not invested in those relationships over there.

His ex actually showed up at his door to criticize his parenting.

My ex expected me to carry on the consequences she set for the kids at their house for their behavior on her husband’s birthday but I didn’t.

She realized this when she saw our daughter with her friends on Wednesday and my ex was mad enough to come by the house and yell at me.

She said I should be presenting a united front with her on this and demanding they treat her husband better as their third parent.

I just told her to leave and closed the door.

She might be back.

Then yesterday my kids saw her outside the diner they typically go to with friends on Thursday’s.

They said she didn’t look happy.

So I guess she’s getting ready to confront me about it again potentially.

AITA for not disciplining the kids for the birthday incident?

In this case, I can understand why he’s unwilling to be a united front.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

This person says the kids don’t see any reason to show respect for their stepdad.

She shouldn’t have insisted on the kids spending the day with their stepdad.

Here’s a suggestion to put the kids in therapy.

This person points out the bright side.

It’s easy to see why his kids like him more than their mom.

She needs to grow up like, yesterday.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.