This stay-at-home mom is handling a full-time job of her own—three kids, household chores, and emotional labor.

But when her husband took on a time-consuming hobby without asking and still expects more affection, she started wondering if she was the problem.

Read on for the story.

AITA for Being Overwhelmed as a SAHM While My Husband Expects More?

I’m a stay-at-home mom to three kids: a teenager, a 7-year-old, and a 3-year-old.

My husband works a stressful job that he enjoys, and he recently became the coach of our oldest’s soccer team.

He’s busy, and I appreciate how much he does outside the home.

But here’s where we’re clashing.

I do everything for the two younger kids—getting them ready for school, dropping off the 7-year-old and teenager (the 3-year-old stays with me all day), groceries (with a tantrum-throwing toddler in tow), cleaning, cooking, baths, bedtime, and more.

By the time the day ends, I’m physically and emotionally drained.

No kidding!

When my husband gets home he’s heading out to soccer practice, or taking a long nap.

He’s stays late at work if their is no soccer, to finish paperwork.

Then he wakes up from his nap and expects me to be in a flirty, loving mood.

If I’m stressed or too tired, he gets upset.

He also gets mad if I’m not in the best mood when he gets home, even though I’ve been juggling all the housework and kids by myself.

Hard to muster up the energy for a smile after that!

One big issue is that we never discussed him becoming the soccer coach.

I understand he enjoys it, and our kid loves having him as a coach, but I feel like he should have talked to me about it first.

Now, I’m the one stuck at home with the two little ones during every practice and game.

I hardly attend the games anymore because the kids just run off to the playground, and I can’t sit and watch.

It’s also isolating because after games, the team often goes out to eat, and since I’m not there, I feel excluded.

I’d love to be part of that since I rarely get adult interaction.

Because of his coaching responsibilities, he has to be at every practice and game, leaving me with fewer chances to get out of the house for things like getting my nails done, working out, or grabbing coffee with a friend.

And at home, I feel like I’m cleaning up after everyone constantly—my husband doesn’t even put his dirty clothes in the hamper; they end up on the floor next to it.

Woof.

Now that summer has started and all three kids are home, the workload is even heavier.

I wish he’d take the kids outside to play so I could clean without interruptions.

I’m not asking him to cook or clean, just to help lighten my load a little.

Never Miss a Story

Sign up to get our BEST stories of the week straight to your inbox.

He thinks I’m overreacting because he works outside the home and doesn’t see my role as stressful.

He’s also frustrated that I’m not “flirty or loving enough.”

Am I the problem here for wanting more understanding and help?

While both parents are busy in different ways, most would agree that managing three kids and a house without support isn’t exactly a relaxing gig.

This person says Husband needs to be a better partner.

This person has some suggestions.

And this person can see how tough she has it.

If he wants more smiles, he might want to start by picking up his own socks.

And maybe asking what he can do for her.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.