Getting a tattoo is something that many people do, and they often have some type of special meaning to the individual.

What would you do if a friend got a tattoo of her deceased boyfriend’s name, and now, years later, people she is dating break up with her because of it?

When this woman asked the man in this story why they would break up with her, he gave her his honest opinion and now she is hurt.

Was he wrong to give his opinion, or was it the right thing to do? Let’s read the whole story to decide.

AITAH for telling a friend that a tattoo on her chest saying “Forever Brian’s” is a deal breaker for most men. Even though Brian has since passed away.

I’ve got a friend named Ula that is relatively new as I’ve only known her for 4 years.

She has a tattoo on her chest just below her collar bone that says “Forever Brian’s”.

That is sweet, but tattoos like this are rarely a good idea.

She got it when she was quite young (early 20’s) about 15yrs ago when she was engaged to her first love who unfortunately passed away due to cancer, is my understanding. I don’t know the history beyond that it happened quite quickly and she got the tattoo after he passed away.

I’ve been watching her date for about 4 years now and the tattoo has consistently been a sticking point for the 3-4 or so guys that I’ve seen her with. Each one has said it differently but they’ve all said that they’d like her to get it removed or that it makes them uncomfortable enough to leave the relationship when it got serious.

Be careful what you ask for.

Last night Ula and my wife were having a girls night together and I was downstairs enjoying some Baldur’s Gate 3 when they both came down and asked for a “guy’s opinion” and harassed me until I put the controller down.

I warned them, repeatedly, that if they ask me for a “guys opinion” that I would provide one but it might be hurtful.

So, I asked the ladies if they remembered the movie Titanic?

They both said yes.

I asked them if they remembered what the core theme of the movie was.

They both answered that it was a love story between Jack and Rose.

He makes a good point.

So I told Ula “Do you know who it wasn’t a love story for? Rose’s husband. Rose’s husband married her, had children with her. Stayed married too her for roughly 60 years and grew old together, overcame adversity and successfully had a long life together.”

But Rose didn’t think of her husband or those memories together when she died 60 years later. She thought of Jack. All of that living that Rose and her husband did together meant little because in the end when she passed away, she went to her first love, Jack.

Not everyone will think like this, but many will.

I looked at Ula and said “That tattoo is written confirmation that they’re not your forever person. Which is fine when your casually dating but what your indirectly asking for when things start to get serious is if they’re willing to sign up to be your Rose’s husband.”

I agreed that Brian had passed away over a decade ago. I agreed it wasn’t fair. I agreed that they were stupidly competing with a dead person. I agreed that removing it won’t change how she felt about Brian.

My bottom line was this was a “one guys” opinion on the matter, which obviously all her previous boyfriends to some degree agreed with me on, as each one had raised it as a serious issue to them.

She is never going to listen.

I wasn’t trying to start a huge argument but that’s basically what happened so I tried a different approach and told her “Look, not trying to start stuff but everyone wants to find their forever person, what your doing is basically telling these guys you’ve already found yours and that’s not changing so they keep it casual for as long as they can when you try to get serious they leave to protect themselves because no one wants to be a placeholder and it doesn’t help how aggressively you defend it.”

Shortly after she passed out on the couch much to my relief.

In hindsight this should’ve been a conversation to have while sober.

So, was I too harsh? Was I a jerk?

Even the next morning she was slowly crying and committing to removing it. Which I told her to talk it out with more than just friends and maybe seek out a professional opinion before removing it but I sure felt like a royal jerk. It really felt like there was no winning here. Just a lot of hurt feelings and distant tragedy.

He said what she needed to hear. She was living in denial to think that this tattoo wouldn’t impact her future relationships.

The people in the comments on Reddit have a lot to say about this as well. Check it out.

Yup, if they didn’t want to know, they shouldn’t have asked.

I generally agree with this commenter.

The fact that it says his name and forever is a big problem.

He really handled this situation well.

She finally realized it had to go.

That tattoo is a deal breaker for most people.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.