Respect in any relationship means listening when someone says no.

What would you do if a man you’d been chatting with showed up at your apartment even though you told him you weren’t up to seeing him yet?

This woman recently returned from a trip, and she thought she made it clear that she needed to rest.

But she later learned that the man she’d been chatting with visited her apartment building.

Read the story below to find out more.

AITA for being upset that a guy came to my apartment after I told him I wasn’t up for seeing him this weekend?

I (30sF) have been talking to a guy (40sM) for a while whilst I was out of the country, and we have discussed meeting up when I got back last week.

We’re not officially together, but we’ve been getting closer and making plans to meet.

We talk on the phone, FT, and message each other pretty much daily.

This woman told this man she’s not up for meeting him.

We had tentative plans to meet up this weekend, but because my body hates jet lag, nothing was confirmed.

On Friday, I told him times that I wasn’t up for seeing him.

I’ve been jet lagged, exhausted, dealing with a lot of stuff here, and just wanted to rest and reset.

I tried to keep it light and humorous, but I thought I was being clear that I wasn’t available.

She woke up to multiple missed calls and text messages from him.

He’s kept on pushing it despite what I’ve said.

I put my phone on DND and went to bed early.

When I woke up, I saw I had multiple missed calls and messages from him in the early hours.

In the last one, he said that he had been at my apartment building.

She was surprised to learn that he went all the way to her apartment building.

I never invited him, and I definitely didn’t tell him to come over.

I had shared where I live, so he knew the building, but not which apartment I live in.

I don’t have an issue with him knowing the building details.

We’ve shared enough that I do feel comfortable with him. And honestly, I’m disappointed that I’ve not felt up to seeing him.

She felt like it was crossing a boundary.

I feel a bit weird that he showed up even though I’d already said I wasn’t up for it.

He seemed to think it was a sweet or funny gesture.

But to me it’s making me think he’s crossed a boundary.

Now, she’s wondering if she was just overreacting.

Now, I’m second-guessing myself.

I never literally wrote “do not come to my apartment” or “I am not seeing you this weekend.”

But I thought what I said was clear enough.

Am I overreacting for feeling weird about this, or AITA for being upset?

Did he cross the boundary, or was she too vague?

Let’s read the responses of other people on Reddit to this story.

This user gives their honest opinion.

Here’s a possible response to the man.

Trust your instincts and stay away from him, advises this person.

People are saying the same thing,

Finally, here’s a short but valid point.

Some people won’t take a hint.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.