Sometimes, doing the right thing leaves you feeling so wrong.

So, what would you do if your elderly parent were still driving even though he can barely walk and has had two strokes? Would you be okay with him continuing to drive? Or would you consider the risk-to-reward ratio and make an informed decision, even if it meant taking away his last little bit of independence?

In the following story, one daughter faces this decision and chooses safety over all else. Here’s what’s going on.

AITA for convincing my elderly dad to give up his car

My dad is late 80s, has had 2 strokes, and is just slowing down. The stroke means he struggles walking more than 20 meters.

He drives once a week to town to drop off and then pick up my mom, who has had 3 minor strokes, has a speech impediment, and gets tired very quickly.

I’ve convinced him to give up the car because I think the risk-to-reward ratio is high now.

Other family members think the car symbolizes independence.

I don’t want him to hurt himself or someone else for the sake of organizing a taxi. The money isn’t an issue, but he will generate about $5k and save an additional $1k by not paying premiums.

Several other family members have told me that my problem-solving mentality has ignored the emotional impact on my dad and mom. The car provides a perception of independence, and the car could just sit in the drive.

To be clear, I’m not a parachute child.

She thinks it’s the right choice.

I visit at least weekly and often two or three times a week during holidays, call daily, organized their finances over the past couple of years so they are very sorted, and arranged some home help (originally against their wishes but now they wouldn’t be without it).

So, I pushed the sale of the car, which is an emotional hook to past independence, and probably signposts the last stage of their life against the casual wishes of other family members who don’t really do anything helpful on a regular basis.

Clearly, I think it’s a sensible and obvious thing to do, knowing that I’ll be the one to have to resolve any issues from accidents or even just getting rid of it later when it’s worth less from lack of use.

AITA?

Yikes! It sounds like everyone has a strong opinion about this.

Let’s see what the folks over at Reddit think about her decision-making.

According to this reader, she would know better than anyone else.

This reader’s father uses the Uber app for independence.

Here’s someone who gets it.

This person’s mother recently went through something similar.

She’s making the right choice.

For now, she should ignore other opinions and just do what she knows is best.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.