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This story has a tragic beginning. A family is in a car accident. Thankfully, they all survived, but the teenage daughter was paralyzed from the waist down.

Now, that teen is all grown up, but she’s pretty frustrated with her parents about how they’re handling the money from the insurance settlement after the accident. She needs that money for medical expenses, but her parents keep finding other things to spend the money on and only want to give her a certain amount each year instead of giving her all the money.

She’s all grown up, and she thinks she should be in charge of the money. Is she right?

Keep reading for all the details.

AITAH for asking my parents for the money they stole from my insurance settlement and then lied about?

I (25F) got into a car accident with my family (mom, dad, and younger brother) which paralyzed me from the waist down when I was 15.

My mom broke her femur and some ribs. My dad had a minor concussion and my brother had some minor abdominal bruising and was never admitted to the hospital.

The accident was caused 100% by the other driver and as a result, led to an insurance settlement when I was 16.

OP’s family and community did everything they could to help with her medical expenses.

The community I lived in at the time was very generous and donated about $35k to help with my medical bills.

I was also very fortunate to receive top of the line rehab at a couple out of state hospitals, and I’m sure cost quite a bit.

My maternal grandparents also donated a ton of money to this rehab (probably close to $15k if I had to estimate).

Since then my parents paid for my college with a 529 plan already established long before I was paralyzed.

Thanks to the great medical care and college, I now live independently, work a decent job, and can afford all my bills for now.

Her parents changed their minds about how to spend the settlement money.

Because the driver who caused the accident was just an individual rather than a company, my parents elected not to sue the individual and to just take the auto insurance settlement.

The problem is, my parents have changed their story about the settlement money countless times.

At first they said all the money—including the portion of the settlement that didn’t belong to me—would go into some investment account that I could access at their discretion if I ever needed medical care.

Then a couple years later when I was 19 and my brother was 17, they purchased a second house down the road from them intended for my brother. My dad did it sort of impulsively but they justified to me saying they had spent a lot of money on my medical bills and it wasn’t fair that my younger brother hadn’t received as much time, money, or attention out of the whole ordeal. They rented it out for 4 years at a loss while my brother was in school.

Here’s what life looks like now.

Meanwhile, I moved out on my own to another state immediately after graduating college and have been paying all of my own bills ever since.

Fast forward to today, my brother has lived in the house for a year but it turns out they weren’t planning to give him the house for free like they originally said. Apparently they wanted him to pay back the mortgage on it which he can’t afford.

He is now moving back in with them.

I assumed the insurance settlement money had all been spent, but about a week ago my mom said they had “discovered” another medical account and that I could just ask them if I ever needed medical supplies and they would reimburse me.

I bet there’s a lot of money in this account.

I asked if I could just have control over the money to invest for myself and how much money was there.

It turns out the entirety of the insurance settlement for all my family members had been put tax-free in my mom’s universal life insurance policy on the advice of their financial advisor.

They said they didn’t know how much money was there but that they planned to give me $10k/year for medical expenses and after they pass away they plan to make my brother in charge of distributing those funds to me.

When I asked why they hadn’t been doing that for the past few years, they claimed I was “financially irresponsible.”

That’s ridiculous. She sounds very responsible.

My credit score is over 750, I have lived on my own since age 21, I’ve never missed a payment, I religiously track all expenses and income on spreadsheets, I’ve never carried a balance on my credit card, and my partner and I have a net worth of over $40k.

I understand I could theoretically do better, but I have never given anyone any reason to believe I was financially irresponsible.

Initially I was thrilled but my partner was skeptical because my parents have changed their story about this money so many times.

So I did some digging on the court cases to find that my parents had been appointed as my guardians by the court to manage my $130,000 settlement until I became an adult. My brother also received a $30,000 settlement. So this money has been commingled and was put in my parents’ investment account rather than a trust or a UGMA account for me.

She wants her parents to transfer the money to her.

I’m thinking of asking my parents and their financial advisor to correct their errors in the most tax-advantaged way possible because I no longer trust them.

I plan to ask them to transfer to me the $130,000 plus any unrealized capital gains that have accumulated over the past 7 years.

Considering the average performance of the S&P500 over the past 7 years, that $130,000 should have more than doubled and $10k/year they promised would still allow them to profit off of my own insurance settlement for my spinal cord injury.

She knows what she wants to do with the money, and it definitely doesn’t sound irresponsible.

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I’m tired of my insurance settlement being in their fickle hands and I don’t trust them to have my best interest in mind.

I want to invest this money in a Roth IRA for my inevitable medical expenses I will have as I age as a wheelchair user.

If they don’t voluntarily comply, would I have a decent legal case against them?

And AITAH for asking for this money as a lump sum?

Wow! That’s crazy that her parents keep changing their minds about the money and even seemed to forget where it was. How about they sell the house they bought for her brother and give her any profit off of that too.

Let’s see how Reddit responded to this story.

This person thinks she needs to sue.

Another person suggests hiring a lawyer.

This person shares what really bothered them about what the parents said.

It doesn’t seem like much considering.

It does seem like her parents are stealing her money. Either they really did forget about the other account and there’s a lot of money in it, or they spent all the money, feel bad, and are offering $10,000 a year as a way of covering it up.

Either way, the money is hers, and she’s an adult. They shouldn’t be in charge of her money anymore.

I’m sure a lawyer could help her out, but it would forever ruin her relationship with her family. Of course, if they stole from her, is it really worth trying to keep the relationship on good terms?

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Author

Jayne Elliott

Jayne Elliott | Contributing Writer, Life & Drama

Jayne Elliott is a contributing writer and editor for TwistedSifter specializing in human interest stories, internet culture, and family dynamics. With over 12 years of editorial experience in digital publishing, Jayne excels at analyzing complex online communities and transforming viral social debates into thoughtful, highly engaging narratives.

Rather than simply aggregating internet drama, Jayne brings a sharp, empathetic editorial eye to everyday dilemmas. She has a unique talent for unpacking the nuances of pop culture and online conflicts, providing readers with relatable, well-researched commentary.

Based in California, Jayne spends her free time outside the newsroom exploring theme parks with her family or beach-combing along the coast.

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