November 13, 2024 at 11:49 pm

Couple Agreed They Wouldn’t Travel Much After Their First Child Was Born, But Her Husband Keeps Planning More And More Trips

by Jayne Elliott

Source: Reddit/Petty Revenge/Pexels/Timur Weber

Travel is a priority for some people, and if you can afford it and have time for it, that’s great.

In today’s story, a couple who loves to travel is currently at a rocky point in their relationship because they recently had their first child.

The husband wants to travel as much as ever before, but his wife wants him to stay home and help her.

Let’s see how the story unfolds…

AITA for not letting my husband go on ANOTHER vacation with his friend?

We’ve always kept our $ separate and split bills evenly. We made roughly the same $ so it wasn’t an issue.

We had our first child 1.5y ago. I was working p/t a lot of my preg and after my 12w leave b/c we couldn’t find daycare. I also just started my own business, but it’s taking longer to get clients, so I’m currently not even making enough $ to cover “my half” of the bills.

I started working 16h shifts on w/ends to make more $, but it’s not enough. I do all of the cooking, cleaning, and most things for our son. I’m still nursing him.

My hub has never given him a bath. I have done EVERY SINGLE night waking (he still wakes 1-2 /night). My hub works mostly f/t but does whatever he wants when he comes home and on the w/ends.

OP and her husband agreed to travel less when their child was born.

We’ve traveled a lot together. B4 we started TTC, we talked about how we will have to put travel on hold for a bit.

He agreed and was fine with it. That turned into having 1 more trip before TTC so we went to Greece.

Once preg it was 1 more trip b4 he’s born so we went to Iceland. T

hen he planned another trip with his friend to Spain w/out me knowing and told me about 2w before he left. I was 28w preg and very upset.

The traveling hasn’t stopped.

Then he tried going to Mexico with his BIL 2w b/4 my due date, and I talked him out of it.

Then we went on a trip to MA when our son was 3m and then to CO when he was 10m.

Then he went to Mexico with his BIL a few m ago which he told me about days before he left.

I just found out he is planning another trip with his friend to Albania w/o me knowing AGAIN.

OP has had enough.

I finally put my foot down. We are a family and just b/c our $ is separate, we are in this together and can’t afford it.

Just b/c I am not making as much $ doesn’t mean I am doing less or am less valuable.

Ppl don’t leave the country with their friend while their wife stays home to take care of the baby alone.

Sometimes we need to sacrifice our wants. It’s just temporary.

OP’s husband is mad at her.

He was BEGGING me to let him go, and I said I really am not ok with it and I’m sorry but I think you’re being selfish.

He said he deserves a vacation.

I kept firm and told him I am not ok with it.

Since then (1w) he hasn’t spoken to me.

OP’s husband sent her a text stating his side of the sitatuion.

He sent me this text:

“I feel like I had my soul sucked out. I’m not trying to be dramatic but I would do anything just to take a few days to travel. It’s my biggest passion what I get excited for.

And don’t pretend a person with a family never goes on a vacation with friends/family. All I want is every 2y to go on a trip with (friend). I feel like that is very minimal compared to what others have as hobbies.

Even before we were married I begged you to go on trips with your friends because I know what it does spiritually. Life is so short and it could be gone in an instant. Seeing more and more friends of mine pass away is truly making me depressed and scared. I don’t want to hear a counter point because I don’t want to argue.”

Is he the asshole for doing this to me again or AITA for not letting him?

I don’t think her husband understands what a sacrifice she has had to make as a mom. It changed how she works. It changed her free time. Meanwhile, it seems like it changed nothing for her husband. He needs to pitch in and help his wife.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story…

This reader doesn’t think her husband is treating her like a wife.

Source: Reddit/Petty Revenge/

Another reader votes for divorce.

Source: Reddit/Petty Revenge/

The dad doesn’t seem to understand what it means to be a dad.

Source: Reddit/Petty Revenge/

They could try marriage counseling.

Source: Reddit/Petty Revenge/

OP could give her husband a bill.

Source: Reddit/Petty Revenge/

They really need to talk about their finances and time.

A child changes things.

If you liked that story, check out this post about an oblivious CEO who tells a web developer to “act his wage”… and it results in 30% of the workforce being laid off.