It seems pretty common that families forget that a wedding is about the bride and groom and not about the extended family.

Instead of letting the bride and groom make all the decisions, family members sometimes try to push their own desires onto the wedding.

In today’s story, one stepmom really wants to be a part of her stepdaughter’s wedding even though the stepdaughter just wants her to attend the wedding as a guest.

Let’s see how the story plays out…

AITA for not pushing for my wife to have a bigger role in my daughter’s wedding?

My ex and I weren’t together very long when we had our daughter Riley.

We broke up while my ex was still pregnant.

A year and a half later, my ex married her husband, Phillip.

Riley was with me every Tuesday and then every other weekend, with split holidays.

As she lived with her mom and Phillip more, he became a father figure to her.

She doesn’t call him dad, but has made it clear she thinks she has 2 dads.

I have never been threatened by Phillip and have a lot of respect for him.

He, my ex, and I get along well.

He eventually remarried.

I married my wife when Riley was 13.

While the two of them get along, they aren’t as close as she is to Phillip.

I know she doesn’t consider her another mother figure.

I was also okay with this as Phillip had been in my daughter’s life longer and was around her when she was young.

Riley was always very polite and considerate towards my wife.

I could tell my wife was hurt they weren’t closer but I didn’t want to push the issue.

My wife and I had a son together.

Riley’s stepmom isn’t part of the wedding party.

Now, Riley is in her mid-20s and is getting married.

I’m walking her down the aisle, with Phillip on her other arm.

My son is going to be a junior groomsman.

My ex is being escorted by her father down the aisle as well.

Riley’s siblings from her mom’s side are also in the wedding party.

When my wife asked Riley what her role was, my daughter said she wanted her to sit up front and she’ll be in family photos.

My wife asked about a special dress, and Riley said they could go shopping together, but she didn’t care what she wears, she doesn’t have to match the bridal party or anything.

Riley’s stepmom is feeling left out.

My wife is very hurt and wants a larger role in the wedding.

She wants to walk our son down the aisle, but Riley said her sister on her mom’s side who’s close in age with him is walking with him as they’re a junior bridesmaid.

My wife kept suggesting other ways she could walk down the aisle, and Riley gently shut her down.

I wasn’t here for this conversation and only found out about it later.

My wife came to me and says I need to convince my daughter to give her some role in the wedding.

He doesn’t want to push his daughter to include the stepmom.

I say it’s my daughter’s day and I’m not going to tell her who gets what role.

She’ll have the opportunity to do mother of the groom stuff if/when our son ever gets married.

She said that Phillip has a big role, he even gets a dance with my daughter at the wedding (we’re splitting the song so I get half, Phillip gets the other).

I pointed out that Phillip has been in her life since she was 10 months old and helped raise her.

They don’t have that dynamic.

My wife is now very upset with me and says I’m enabling my daughter excluding her.

I really don’t feel this is my place.

AITA for not pushing the matter more?

The stepmom should respect the stepdaughter’s wishes.

If she’s too pushy, she’s going to push Riley even further away.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted…

The stepmom is being unrealistic.

This dad is a great dad.

His relationship with Philip is admirable.

The stepmom is the selfish one.

The stepmom needs to realize it’s not her wedding.

The stepmom needs to respect the bride’s wishes.

Get with the program, lady.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.