Sharing a home with someone involves some adaptation, but what would you do if your partner didn’t take your food preferences seriously?

In this man’s case, his partner loves to cook and he loves his cooking, but because he doesn’t like certain ingredients, he has been called “picky”.

He decided to prepare his own meals from now on, but is now wondering if he’s making a big deal out of this.

Let’s read the whole story.

AITA for Being Selective About Food? (Picky…ish?)

My (29M) partner (35M) and I moved in together and have been cohabiting well enough after 6 years of being a couple.

We split chores fairly and I handle more of the general housework/housekeeping but his kingdom is the kitchen and I respect it.

He has a huge problem, however, with my “eating habits”.

He has preferences, but for good reasons.

There are a few foods I simply won’t eat, like fish, olives, and a few other super pungent things.

I also have a sensitive stomach so I avoid leftovers in general – especially avoiding cooked dishes over 2 days old.

I also have voiced preferences but have stressed that I am able to and happy to eat things lower on my list.

For example, he offered me a choice between black beans and white beans for a meal and I chose the black beans, as I said I generally dislike white beans.

His partner disagrees.

This annoyed him because he sees no difference between them and had 3 cans of white beans that he got on a grocery trip without me knowing and now is convinced that I won’t eat them.

(I’ve said I will, and how was I supposed to know there was a right and a wrong choice??).

I’ve said that I generally prioritize steak/chicken over ground beef and that I avoid it and he’s convinced that I hate ground beef now.

He just won’t listen.

For context: I’m not a classic picky eater.

I like most vegetables and ways to prepare them, I’ve liked almost every dish he puts together and I compliment them often.

I also very frequently help him cook and provide ideas and alternatives that have gone over really well.

I mostly just have voiced preferences.

I even went out of my way to take 2 semesters of nutrition in college to make sure I have a varied diet just because I’m interested in the subject!

Last night he said I was being mean and ungrateful to him as a result, but I’m very confused because I’ve proposed and have offered a ton of alternatives.

He really went out of his way.

I’ve offered/tried all of the below:

Paying more into the grocery budget than him (he hates even the idea).

Providing and preparing my own protein choice when he wants to have fish.

Encouraging him to cook fish when he wants it and turning on a candle afterwards, despite me absolutely hating the smell.

Offering to get a separate takeout dish for myself.

Pointing out middle ground options like being ok with tuna in some dishes, instances where I like raw onions, etc.

Finally, he decided that enough was enough, but he feels unsure about his decision.

Tired of offering compromises and alternatives, I told him to stop worrying about me for meals and that I still thrived on a diverse and healthy diet before he came around.

So I would from now on be preparing my meals separately from him and in instances where it wouldn’t get in his way when he’s cooking.

I have no idea how to further compromise without putting myself in uncomfortable situations or getting sick over leftovers.

AITA?

I think it’s healthy to have separate preferences.

Let’s see how Reddit feels about this.

A reader shares some thoughts.

Food for thought.

This commenter shares their opinion.

True.

Another reader chimes in.

This person sums it up.

It’s not something personal against his cooking.

They’re just different people.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.