No one wants to think they’re a bad parent (at least, not people who care about being parents) and we try especially hard to not look terrible in front of other people.

Some folks just don’t care, apparently, because most of these replies are pretty obviously awful parenting.

It breaks my heart.

Give kid an order to do something without instructing them on what to do.

Watch them fail at the task and then berate their intelligence and swear at them.

I don’t think anyone reasonable would disagree.

I was working takeout at a restaurant one night and a door dash driver pulled up to pick up an order.

The pot smoke in the car was so thick that I literally couldn’t see the driver. It was like a fog machine was set up inside the car. As i approached, they rolled down the window and smoke began flowing out enough that I could see the interior of the car.

In the backseat, in a car seat was a toddler. I’m not against weed in and of itself, but hotboxing a three year old is completely f**ked.

It’s pretty cringe.

Using the children for content.

Ugh, ESPECIALLY during vulnerable emotional moments. It’s one thing if they’re having fun, but when they’re crying? Put your GD phone down and give them a hug for goodness sakes.

What is wrong with people?

You’re not doing them any favors.

Refusing to admit to their child that they were wrong or made a mistake.

It’s really common to feel like you can never admit to being wrong because it would undermine your authority, but all you’re doing is modeling emotional immaturity, breeding resentment, and setting your child up for terrible relationship dynamics in the future.

All too common.

When your child is scared of you.

Ask almost any kid who grew up with abusive or toxic parents.

99% of them will have a similar story, and it’s being afraid of your parents, of being afraid when you’re home, and never feeling safe.

We’re all shook.

My MIL literally yelled this at me when she apologized to me for treating her son like shit. I told her she didn’t need to apologize to me but to her own son and her response was “I don’t apologize to my children and won’t ever”.

Shook me to my core but also sealed my opinion of her as a terrible parent.

They won’t forget it.

Giving your child the shaft because of a romantic partner.

My ex has been doing that with our 13 year-old daughter for a while now. Until a few years ago, we were fine with 50/50 custody…and then she told me about some of the ridiculous shit that was happening at her dad’s house with his nasty wife.

I took him to mediation and gave him and his wife a year to turn it around. It only got worse, so, I took primary custody. She is happy to be here but feels abandoned by her father (he is supposed to see her every other weekend but that doesn’t always happen), which is a fair assessment.

We are working through it in therapy but it’s heartbreaking to watch. She adores her dad and so badly wants to see more of him. It’s awful.

You should be a cheerleader.

If you’re always pointing out the negative of your kids personality or ability, they are going to live up to that.

Accentuate the positive.

So selfish.

Turning a child against their other parent. Parental alienation because you hate the other parent. So damn selfish.

My folks have been divorced for as long as I can remember. My old man has only ever once said anything bad about her and immediately apologized for it. Meanwhile she talks shit about him at every opportunity, decades later.

The things Disney characters have witnessed.

Ugh I just saw a video the other day that was supposed to just be some cute video of Rei at Disneyland interacting with these two kids, and the mom filming the video is like “Oh [child’s name]’s smiling! I didn’t know you could smile!”

What an absolutely f**ked up thing to say at all let alone on video, and I’m sure that mom is going to be surprised when her daughter continues to not smile throughout her life because her mom rudely keeps pointing out that she “never smiles”.

This is so far from ok.

My step-dad used to brag to his friends and my family members about beating me.

Thought it made him look tough to ‘kick my ass’. Legit once worked for 5 hours weeding the backyard in 95 degree weather to earn 10 bucks to go see The Dark Knight Rises. When I got home from the movie he had forgotten he gave me the money for it and greeted me by punching me directly in the face, and then kicking my ribs in when I was down.

Hell, he once smashed a frying pan into my back because I did the dishes and my mom put her salad bowl in after I was done. He thought I was lazy and just stopped washing.

So pretty much just don’t follow his example.

Let them be themselves.

Belittling your child’s hobbies and interests just because they are different from what you like.

Your child is their own person, not just a miniature copy of you.

A full-body flinch.

Coming from someone who used to be abused as a young child, severe flinching from parents. Ig some flinching is normal if a hand comes out of nowhere very quickly but if a parent so much as raises their hand and the child full body flinches, that’s very strange.

I used to flinch very bad when I was being abused, still do but not full body trying to get away type flinching. Also if the child looks panicked if the parent seems to get aggravated

It is a big deal.

Being emotionally unavailable to your child.

I’m 34 and only now realize how harmful this has been. Being raised in a cold and formal way is nothing short of emotional neglect.

A short list.

Your adult kids going no contact. Hitting your kid. Shaming or embarrassing your kid. Ignoring your kid. Putting your kid in the middle of your co parenting.

They’re only human.

Not showing compassion, and patience when their child makes a mistake.

It’s just not true.

“I’m big, you’re little. I’m smart, you’re dumb. I’m right, you’re wrong.”

There are way too many people who have kids who have no business raising kids.

I hope that changes some day in the future.