September 29, 2023 at 9:42 am

‘We make everything about ourselves.’ A Woman Talked About The Harmful “What About Me?” Effect on Social Media

by Matthew Gilligan

Source: TikTok/@sarahthebookfairy

Well, what about me?!?!

How often do you hear that phrase these days?

If you’re on social media, you probably see A TON of comments from people making, well, everything about them.

And a woman named Sarah addressed the issue in a viral TikTok video where she talked about the “What About Me?” effect and said that it “basically combines individualistic culture with being chronically online.”

Sarah pointed out that this mindset essentially makes people question why every single social media post doesn’t consider them and their needs.

And if something doesn’t consider their needs, the question these folks ask themselves is “What About Me?” and they try to make it all about them.

Source: TikTok/@sarahthebookfairy

Sarah used a TikTok video posted by a woman named Kara as an example of this phenomenon.

In her video, Kara made soup and talked about the recipe. Kara is anemic and eats the soup while she is menstruating because the recipe is high in iron.

Sarah said that the comments on Kara’s video are perfect examples of the “What About Me?” effect. Commenters asked what they should do if they don’t like beans and one viewer even asked Kara to share a recipe that has a substitute for beans.

Source: TikTok/@sarahthebookfairy

Of course, most of us would just keep scrolling if we saw something that didn’t interest us or pertain to us on social media, but Sarah said this behavior reflects the “individualistic culture we have created in the United States.”

Sarah explained and said, “We make everything about ourselves.”

I think she nailed this one right on the head.

Source: TikTok/@sarahthebookfairy

Take a look at what she had to say.


#beansoup #beansoupcontroversy #chronicallyonline #individualism

♬ original sound – Sarah

Here’s the video that Sarah referenced in her video, FYI.


All my anemic girlies this one is for you 💀 #soup #period #highiron #plantiron #vegan #veganrecipes #periodpositivity #momsoftiktok #womenshealth #anemia

♬ Little Things – Adrian Berenguer

Here’s how people responded.

This person thinks this sums up Gen Z folks pretty well.

Source: TikTok/@sarahthebookfairy

Another individual made an excellent point.

Just move on!

Source: TikTok/@sarahthebookfairy

And this TikTok user summed it all up perfectly.

More of this, please!

Source: TikTok/@sarahthebookfairy

Just be kind to others online.

Ultimately, that’s all that matters.