December 23, 2023 at 10:48 am

Adoptive Mom Calls Out Her Parents For Ignoring Adopted Daughter’s Place In Their Family

by Trisha Leigh

Source: Reddit/AITA

For a lot of people, they’ve had to learn the hard way that family is about love, not blood.

Because there are too many others out there who are willing to support people for all the wrong reasons – and can often ignore the right ones.

OP and her husband adopted his niece nearly a decade ago.

I adopted my husband’s niece Sarah 9 years ago. While it was hard for Sarah to adapt at first, she loves us and is our daughter.

She’s an amazing kid and loves me and my family.

Now, OP is pregnant and her parents are going on and on about their “first grandchild.” When she confronted them they flat-out said the adopted daughter “didn’t count,” because she was her husband’s family and not theirs.

I’m currently pregnant and two weeks ago we found out it was a girl. When we told my parents they were excited about their “first granddaughter”. It bothered me but I tried to ignore it.

But yesterday I had enough. Mum was mentioning things to pass down and I reacted stronger than I probably should have, but I was pretty mad.

Sarah is their grand daughter since she was 2. Luckily they didn’t say it around Sarah but I was not happy.

We had a fight over it, with them claiming Sarah doesn’t count and trying to justify it by saying she’s from my husband’s family not ours.

OP is thinking that if they aren’t going to treat the two girls the same, then they don’t deserve to be in the lives of either one.

But she’s my daughter, their granddaughter. She calls them her grandparents. My sister is her aunt and my nephew is her cousin.

If they don’t accept Sarah then there’s no way I’m wanting them around either daughter.

Others in her life think she’s overreacting.

My husband thinks what they said was wrong but thinks I should let it go. He thinks it wasn’t meant the way I’m taking it. But with his history he tends to be a bit of a push over when it comes to family (understanding obviously, but still) and they haven’t apologized, if anything they’ve double down.

I don’t want Sarah hearing any of this, and if I can’t trust them to treat our girls equal then I can’t trust them with them.

Everyone else thinks I’m overreacting, but I don’t agree.

Does Reddit? This one just hurts my heart!

The top comment says that it’s important the grandparents treat them equally.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This person reassures OP she is not overreacting.

Source: Reddit/AITA

And this commenter agrees her parent are just wrong here.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Those who have been there say this will absolutely leave a scar.

Source: Reddit/AITA

They say this is not the time to sugar coat things.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This is just so gross to me.

If I was OP I, too, would be drawing some hard lines in the sand.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parent’s 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.