When a family member dies, the distribution of their assets is always a touchy subject.

Especially when emotions are already flaring during a period of grief, people can get caught up in what they consider the “fair” division of their property.

So when this user was made the executor her grandmother’s estate, she was reluctant to distribute the land to her family, except for her cousin who needed surgery after major weight loss.

Was she wrong to pick and choose who she gave their fair share of the estate?

Decide for yourself!

AITA for approving plastic surgery for my cousin?

I come from a giant extended family. My grandparents owned a ton of land in what was basically the middle of nowhere.

It has now become the outskirts of a fast growing city (i.e., it’s very, very valuable).

My grandma died earlier this year, and I became the executor of her estate (oldest grandson, see above re: family is all kinds of fucked up).

And as the one in charge of the estate, OP soon became the family bank…

Obviously, being the executor of a quite large estate, I get loads of requests from my cousins and siblings to sell the land and give them money (or, really, just give them money).

I am in contact with an attorney and an appraiser, both of whom I trust. They both advise against selling, as the land will only be worth more (potentially, a LOT more) in the future.

I am going with their advice and not selling the land, with one exception.

My cousin Anna is the nicest lady you’ll ever meet. She would literally give you the clothes off her back.

While Anna was the image of kindness, her parents were far less agreeable…

My aunt and uncle (60s m/f) are jerks of the highest order. They kept Anna morbidly obese from the time she was a teenager so she couldn’t leave them.

They’d fix her plate with huge quantities of food, then refuse to let her leave the table until it was finished.

They only stocked their house with junk and soda so she didn’t have any alternatives. It was tragic to see as a kid, she was so sad and in so much pain.

She hasn’t had a job, she’s never dated, and she still lives at home with her parents and is pretty much their slave, as she has no alternative.

But when things looked like they would become inconvenient for them, they agreed to get her corrective surgery…

Aunt and Uncle Jerk finally got Anna weight loss surgery about two years ago.

This was right when her weight got to the point where they would have to take care of her, instead of the other way around. Anna has lost over 200 pounds and I’m so, so proud of her.

Anna now has a lot of loose, hanging skin from the weight loss.

And while her parents refused to pay to remove the surgery, OP had no such reservations!

My aunt and uncle won’t pay for removal, so she is constantly in pain and embarrassed by it.

I plan to sell a piece of the land to help pay for Anna’s plastic surgery.

The rest of my siblings and cousins are calling me an asshole, because I’m not giving the money to them.

AITA?

I understand why OP’s family has their nose out of joint, but at the end of the day,  if OP is the executor of the state, she can do what she wants with it!

Reddit was split, with some people thinking OP was the only one that Grandma trusted to appropriately distribute her estate.

But other people thought that OP wasn’t being fair to her other family members.

This user said OP was seriously misconstruing her responsibility as executor.

Finally, this user told OP not to let this issue drive her family apart.

No matter how you feel, if the will says the land goes to everyone… it goes to everyone.

If you liked that story, check out this post about an oblivious CEO who tells a web developer to “act his wage”… and it results in 30% of the workforce being laid off.