November 11, 2024 at 5:23 am

Her Long-Distance Boyfriend Refused To Take Her Off Speaker Around His Family, So She Questioned If He Was Really Listening To Her Needs

by Benjamin Cottrell

Source: Reddit/AITA/Shutterstock

Communication is the key to any successful relationship – especially in a long-distance arrangement.

One woman finds it almost impossible to get a moment alone with her partner.

His penchant for putting her on speakerphone leaves their conversations vulnerable to his family’s constant interruptions.

She finds herself wondering why he’s unwilling to make space for just her.

Read on for the full story.

AITA for refusing to take calls with my BF because he continuously puts me on speaker around his family?

I’ve (29F) been dating my long distance bf (24 M) for 9 months now, we call almost every day.

80% of the time we call, I end up on speaker around his family.

Sometimes he’ll fully converse with them while I’m on the phone.

This makes her feel almost invisible.

I just sit there, not sure if I should say something to them or keep talking to him normally.

It’s just so awkward and uncomfortable and, quite frankly, awful phone etiquette that I shouldn’t have to explain to a grown man.

She’s made her feelings abundantly clear to her boyfriend, but he refuses to listen.

I’ve told him over and over again that I don’t like being on speaker and I’d appreciate if we can just talk privately without everyone being on the call.

One day, it went from annoying to just plain mean.

Today, he called and his sister started asking me random question.I was caught off guard because I didn’t know she was there and that I was on speaker.

Then, as I was saying something, mid sentence, she hung up on me?

As a joke??

Not sure where the humor is, but he called back and she was laughing in the background.

So she finally puts her foot down.

After this, I told him not to call if I’m gonna be on speaker.

He replied, “Why is it such a big deal?”

So I said because I don’t like it?

Now the boyfriend is giving her the silent treatment.

And now he’s ignoring my texts and acting like I’m being irrational and an AH for asking him to have basic phone etiquette.

AITA?

She wanted the problematic behavior to stop, but she didn’t want to stop hearing from him completely.

What did Reddit think?

To this user, the boyfriend’s aloofness signals deeper problems in their relationship.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Having a private conversation as a couple shouldn’t be something you have to twist your partner’s arm about.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This commenter suggests setting a rock hard boundary may be enough to get the boyfriend to take the hint, but they aren’t feeling optimistic it will work.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Solid communication is arguably even more important in a long-distance relationship.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Staying connected with family is great and all, but healthy relationships also require intimacy to thrive.

If he can’t prioritize her, she might have to hang up for good.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.