After fighting cancer at 12, a young man has celebrated six years of being cancer-free with an annual meal surrounded by loved ones.

But when his best friend asked if her boyfriend—who once harassed him during high school—could join the celebration, he was torn between honoring his past trauma and keeping the peace.

Read on for the story…

AITA for not inviting my best friends boyfriend to a “6 year clear of cancer” meal

I 19m suffered from cancer while I was only 12.

I had a lot of people there for me but the one who was there for me the most was my best friend 19f.

She was by my side the whole time, whenever I had to go to hospital for chemotherapy treatment she was always there messaging me, making sure I was okay.

When I arrived back in school I had joined a drama club which was after school and lasted about an hour and a half.

There was one guy in this club that I didn’t not get along with at all.

I’m gay and have knew for a while and after a month of being back at school I had told my closest friends.

They were all supportive, but like everything in high school word got round to other students and tbh I didn’t mind all to much.

She deserves a medal…and maybe a drama club for herself, too.

But this guy in the club found out and was extremely homophobic towards me.

Telling me I should leave the school because no one would want to talk to me anymore and started bringing up hurtful stuff about my cancer I had not long beat.

Such as “it should have taken your life” and “it’s a shame you beat it.”

Fast forwarding to now we are celebrating 6 years of me being clear of it.

We have a meal every year to celebrate, it usually consists of me, my family, my boyfriend 22m who I’ve been with for almost 2 years and my closest friends.

My best friend started dating this guy 5 months and I found out a few weeks into their relationship it was the same guy who said all that hurtful stuff to me 6 years ago.

I spoke to her about it and agreed to give him another chance as she seemed genuinely happy with him and had insisted he had changed.

Me and him still don’t get along but I don’t interfere with their relationship as she is the happiest she has been for awhile.

She then asked a few days ago if he could come to the meal that I was holding for my 6 years clear.

I was pretty hesitant and told her that as much as I’m happy for her being with someone she likes, he was awful to me in high school and I can’t forgive him for what he was like.

Sounds like the only thing that’s “changed” is the guy’s ability to ask for forgiveness…but not actually earn it.

I also told her that he still doesn’t like me as he has made that obvious about a month ago when he said something to another close friend of mine about me and my boyfriend.

She is now calling me childish and started saying I should just forget about it, she also said if he doesn’t come she isn’t going to either.

I don’t know what to do and I don’t know whether to forget everything and let him join in the meal or deny her request of him joining and deal with the consequences of her not joining either.

So AITA for not forgetting what he had done and denying my friends request of him joining?

Reddit thinks holding onto the past hurt is totally justified here. Like, this guy wished he were dead! How dare his friend.

This person doesn’t think this is how true friends act.

This person says she may had been a good friend, but perhaps not anymore.

Some grudges are too hard to swallow, even at a victory dinner.

If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.