Some situations are just extremely difficult to deal with on your own.

This is why this 17-year-old is asking for a second opinion on whether she’s in the wrong for not forgiving her stepmother (whom she calls ‘mom’) for throwing away things her deceased mother left for her.

Let’s analyze the situation.

AITA for being upset with my mom after finding out she threw away the stuff my first mom left me?

I (17 years old, female) have two mom’s.

My first mom passed hours after I was born because of complications that got out of hand when she was pregnant and in labor with me.

Her mom was very special.

According to my dad and my aunt (my first mom’s sister) my first mom had a bad feeling she wouldn’t be taken care of correctly and could pass so she got things in order “just in case”.

They thought she was crazy at the time but she had multiple seizures in the hours after I was born and she died.

Not getting to know her mom colored her entire life, but she left mementos for her.

I was 7 hours old.

She never even got to hold me.

Part of her will included things I was to inherit.

Including two stuffed bunnies, two necklaces, a bracelet and her engagement ring, a scrapbook she made as a teenager and some charms and other stuff that were sentimental to her.

Her dad also knew how precious these items were for her.

My dad kept it in a safety deposit box for me.

He wanted them to be safe for me to claim when I got older.

When I was 4 my dad met my mom and they moved pretty quickly and got married.

They were dating less than a year.

Now my dad feels bad about it.

Especially because she was the only relationship he had other than my first mom.

Everything was going well so far, she had a mother figure.

I started calling her mom pretty quickly and we had a good family life.

I have younger siblings and we were all good.

When I turned 16 dad and I talked about me taking some of my first mom’s stuff.

I really wanted to see them and look through them but when he went to get them out they were gone.

Unfortunately, they were not there to be found.

After a few weeks of trying to figure out what happened we found out mom had gone and taken them out and threw them away.

She said she was jealous of the fact I had any interest in them at all, but she said the way I’d ask questions about them upset her.

The way my dad guarded them upset her too.

She said dad always said he’d love my first mom, but she got the feeling most of the time that he loved her more.

She wanted to put an end to the idea that she was any kind of mother to me.

Wow. That’s some evil stepmother ****.

I was so angry and hurt.

My dad was furious and he filed for divorce after weeks of arguing about it.

My mom’s family were furious that he’d take it so far.

And because of that they wanted me to stop being upset and angry and they wanted me to tell mom it’s okay.

They wanted me to make it clear she’s still my mom no matter what, because I started using her first name instead of calling her mom.

What she did is hard to forgive, if not impossible.

But I told them I hate her for what she did.

That I can’t believe she stole that from me.

It only made her family angry at me because she has raised me since I was 4 and was mom basically all that time.

Now I put “some trinkets left by a woman” I don’t know ahead of the woman who raised me.

They said I’m prioritizing memories that aren’t mine and a woman I’ll never know, over a woman who has loved me every day since she met me (their words).

They told me she deserves better and for that to be forgivable instead of unforgivable.

AITA?

That’s a very difficult and hurtful situation to deal with.

But nobody is obliged to forgive anyone, especially in a situation like this, and that’s her decision to make.

Let’s see what Reddit has to say about this.

A reader shares their thoughts.

This commenter shares their opinion.

Yup.

Another reader chimes in.

That’s a possibility.

Yup, there is hope!

It’s worth looking for the items.

Her relationship with her stepmother is severed forever after this.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.