You can’t force a blended family to blend, especially when the kids spend most of their time with the other parent.

In today’s story, one teenage boy explains that he doesn’t want to spend time with his stepmom and half siblings when his dad isn’t around, and his dad isn’t around very often.

His dad is making him question if he should spend more time with them anyway.

Let’s read the whole story.

AITA for not going to my dad’s house when my dad isn’t even there even if I’m “needed”?

My parents divorced when me (16m) and my brother (19m) were 1 and 4 years old.

Dad admits he cheated because he was on the road a lot and mom couldn’t deal with him anymore.

He worked away 3 weeks a month and would be home one week a month.

So after the divorce we saw him one week a month like always.

Life changed when he was 7.

He got married again when I was 7.

I never liked his wife. Neither did my brother.

She and my dad have kids together and when she had their first together baby, dad and her requested the court change the custody agreement so me and my brother would spend more time with our half siblings.

Mom fought it.

We didn’t want it either.

But the judge decided we should go one weekend a month when dad wasn’t there so we’d have more time with our halfs.

Things changed again when they turned 14.

Dad and his wife tried to change that to a full week but were denied.

A clause was added that we could stop going that extra weekend once we reached the age of 14.

My brother turned 14 on the Friday we should have been going there and he didn’t go.

Dad’s wife was mad and fought mom about it but my brother got to say no.

He stopped going when he was 14 too.

When I turned 14 I made the same choice.

Though I turned 14 a different week so it was something more expected when I refused to go.

My dad’s wife didn’t like it more when I refused.

She tried to swear some more at mom about it but mom wrote down the incident and said her lawyer would love to hear it so dad’s wife shut up.

Their stepmom sometimes asks them for favors.

There were times my dad wasn’t around and his wife wanted help.

Once it was something broke and she wanted me or my brother to fix it, other times it was she needed something at the store and the kids were sick, babysitting was another one, and a bunch of other things.

We’d always say no.

His stepmom wants him to babysit.

Last weekend dad’s wife sent a text saying she needed me to babysit because she was called into work for the weekend and her babysitter wasn’t around and nobody else could do it.

I told her no.

She said it was one weekend and I should be going there more to see the kids anyway.

I told her not my problem. I never wanted to be there when dad wasn’t.

That was never my decision to go and she needed to shut up and stop bothering me.

His dad talked to him about it.

My dad called the next night and we talked about what happened.

He said his wife was upset and he wanted to know why I never go to his house for a weekend or even a few hours while he’s not there, to see my half siblings.

I said I didn’t want to.

And I told him I was tired of her trying to get me over there when I don’t want to.

He said me and my brother could be better about this and I could spend some time one weekend a month there.

He’s wondering if his dad’s right.

I said I’m already there the weekend he is.

Dad told me it’s not the point and I could go and visit my stepmom (which I always gag when people call her that) and half siblings.

I know my dad’s disappointed in me but if he wanted me and my brother to be closer to his new family he should be around.

Without him I don’t feel like I need to.

But AITA for not going when he’s not there?

He doesn’t have to go there when his dad’s not there if he doesn’t want to, and he doesn’t want to.

That’s that.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

This person has a suggestion of what to tell the dad.

Here’s another suggestion of what to say to the dad.

The suggestions of what to say to the dad just keep getting snarkier!

This is a good summary of the situation.

His dad may not like it, but he isn’t doing anything wrong.

And it’s his choice.

If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.