Parents cannot expect a title they never earned to appear on demand.

The following story is about a young man who grew up barely seeing his biological father.

When he was young, his father never allowed him to call him Dad, but would always introduce him as a “friend’s kid.”

His dad also visited only once or twice a year.

When he was 18, his father finally asked him to start calling him Dad, but he gave him an unexpected answer.

Let’s take a closer look!

You reap what you sow

This happened many years ago, but this is one of many memories that resurfaces about my childhood.

For context, my biological Dad has a wife and kids.

He cheated on his wife with my Mom, and I am the result of that mess.

That side I am aware of, but I’ve had no contact with them.

This young man was never allowed to call his father “Dad.”

Growing up, I would barely see him, maybe once or twice a year.

And when I did, I was never allowed to call him Dad.

He would introduce me to people as a “friend’s kid.”

My parents have always remained in contact with each other.

He kept in contact with her more than me.

She used to try to tell me stuff that they talked about.

His dad invited him to go for a drive.

As I got older and understood this wasn’t how other families worked, I would tell her that if he didn’t want to come see me, he should tell me himself.

Then, I didn’t care. Eventually, she stopped telling me.

The above was for context. Here is where my pettiness comes in.

When I was 18, one of my mother’s siblings passed away, and my Dad came to the viewing.

During this viewing, he came up to me and requested I go for a drive with him.

He wanted to talk to me.

He listened to his dad explain how he regretted some things he did in the past.

I went with him, and after a bit, he started telling me he had made some choices in his life that he now regrets.

He went on like this for a bit, but it was pretty much an emotional dump on me.

He ended this with how he wished for me to call him Dad going forward.

I sat there not saying anything the whole time he dumped all this on me, with many things racing through my head.

I suppose I was silent for a while after his last statement, as he said, “So, what do you think?”

He was quiet and didn’t respond much to him.

I kept my eyes facing forward, not even trying to look at him, as I knew he kept looking at me as he drove.

I just told him that he could wait 18 years, and I’ll see if I’ll allow him to call me daughter.

In my peripheral vision, I saw him just look straight ahead.

He was quiet as he drove us back to my family member’s viewing.

He never wanted to be involved with his dad again.

I have never addressed him as “Dad”.

I’m currently only doing it here so people can understand the dynamics.

Once I moved out on my own, I’ve had zero involvement with him.

After 18 years of being treated like a secret, it is understandable that OP was not ready to suddenly call this man “Dad.”

His response was definitely petty.

But it also reflected years of hurt that could not simply disappear after one emotional conversation.

Let’s check out the comments of other people on this story.

This user shares their personal thoughts.

Here’s an honest opinion.

This one offers a suggestion.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a sister who held up her end of a college savings bargain only to be ripped off by her scheming older sibling.

Here’s a valid point.

Finally, short and simple.

You can’t skip 18 years and expect to be the father they longed for.