When you are interested in someone romantically, part of getting to know them is introducing them to your friends.

What would you do if you introduced a new guy to your best friend, and she started flirting with him and becoming attached to the point that it caused problems?

That is what happened to the young woman in this story, but her response may not have been ideal. It is clear that everyone involved is quite immature.

Read through the full story and see what you think of how this relationship progressed.

Former best friend thinks she was entitled to my love interest and to trespass my boundaries

So, I found this guy, got to know him and then introduced him to my best friend of, back then, 6 years.

Some people love going after people they shouldn’t.

It was kind of obvious that I liked him and he was not the first friend I had introduced to her. What follows are almost two more years of growing tension and conflict because she intensified her behaviour to him and I have never seen her do that before and she also copied my behaviour.

At some point I told her of my interest in case she didn’t know and she said it was fine and she sensed it and she didn’t want anything from him. But her actions that followed didn’t match these words.

Her friend is kind of weird.

What followed was her being very inappropriate with him, then me being annoyed with her, her feeling insecure and wanting reassurance from me, then her not changing anything and the cycle repeats.

Tension build up. Things that stood out most to me were when she asked me for an exact timer for how long she was allowed to touch him because she felt that she needed his touch. Or when she told me I shouldn’t get my hopes up because she thinks he is just nice to everyone, including to her.

This is becoming very unhealthy.

Her getting FOMO when she heard him and I were hanging out without her and her getting competitive when she joined us in our hobbies and she couldn’t keep up.

Ironically her contact to him fuelled our tension and the tension made her seek more contact to him. She started hearing things in my words that I never said and interpreted things in the worst possible way.

Is she planning on breaking up? Now she is acting oddly.

I had a talk to her about loyalty and told her that as my best friend I expected her to be loyal to me and stick to me if anything every happens and him and I seperated, so it would be wise not to put him on the same level as me.

She said she sees loyalty different. Just because him and I wouldn’t get along anymore wouldn’t mean for her that she needed to give up any of the friendships. She could just keep us both seperately.

They both seem very immature, honestly.

After almost 2 years when I’ve had enough and I had a long talk with her about how everything and her behaviour affected me and told her I felt really hurt and set a boundary by asking her to reduce the intensity to him and be a normal friend to him without disrespecting me.

That moment she doubled down. She called me being unfair and that she has needs too and didn’t want to give me an awnser.

Wait. Are these two not even officially dating?

Later my friend who I also introduced to her and has become a mutual friend had a talk with her and she denied to my friend that there was anything romantic between me and him.

She even whipped out screenshots to “prove” he treated her special as well and refused to treat us with the respect that you would give a dating friend or a couple.

To that friend she called me a gatekeeper because I apparently kept him away from her when he came visiting me, even though I always made sure to invite her once or twice when he came around because I knew how left out she felt.

Being friends with these girls must be exhausting.

To that friend she also told a different story that made her look like a victim of exclusion between friends and me being the mean one.

My friend thought she had convinced her at the end of the talk to see some sense, but soon she would write me a defense letter where she focused it around her own suffering and then rewriting my words to use them against me while also gaslighting me by saying she is my ally, but also guilttripping me by saying I was immoral and cruel, etc.

And she was denying my boundary. Apparently she understood my boundary as me wanting her to hurt him now and she couldn’t look herself in the mirror if she did that.

If she isn’t dating the guy, she has no claim on him.

I told her that this was a non negotiable boundary because I felt severely hurt by my friends actions and if she didn’t respect it and take accountability then I would step down from the friendship and asked her to please repair it.

She didn’t. Not one apology or even a hint of recognition of my reality. Instead she kept true to her words and denied my boundary by trying to continue spending time with my love interest.

She is quite dramatic.

He told me she was acting creepily happy and unbothered. Not as if she just lost her 8 year long friendship and shortly after he also drew a line and cut contacts with her.

From friends I heard she had a massive mental breakdown. She threw a tantrum and went from idealising him to devaluing him by calling him a a bad person. She couldn’t feed herself anymore and needed a friends help and suffered from insomnia and needed to attend therapy.

Honestly, it is good that she is trying to reconnect with friends.

After that she just disappeared by going completely quiet for 10 months. She didn’t interact in any group chats anymore or didn’t come to any group events when I was there, but also didn’t leave groups and read everything.

Now, after 10 months, she suddenly reappeared at the mutual friends birthday party who also tried to talk some sense into her. She didn’t make anything right or contact anyone before coming.

She doesn’t know how to act.

Not even with the birthday person. At the birthday, however, she strictly stayed with her only safe person and with acquaintances.

She treated me and my now boyfriend like air and laughed a little too loud and hard with other people. All in all very uncomfortable.

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There is very little logic in matters of love.

What I don’t get is the logic. How can a person get the idea when their best friend brings a man, to go in between and when you get told off and rejected by both you then act like you are the victim and then dissappear rather than to say sorry and then to reappear and act as if nothing is wrong while ignoring us.

Even the birthday girl thinks it’s not ok because that’s just audacious.

Honestly, they both acted very immaturely. And the fact that the guy didn’t officially start dating this girl until this all blew up kind of shows that he is immature as well.

Let’s read through the comments and see what other people have to say about it.

She is obviously very young.

Yeah, she should have let her friend have the guy.

Here is a really good point.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman who wants peace and quiet by the pool, but finds guests and loud music instead.

The fact that they weren’t even dating makes this crazy.

This commenter is spot on.

None of these problems can’t be fixed by simply growing up. If these two are actually adults, that is a much more concerning issue.