Getting a new job can be a very big deal.

Getting married is also a very big deal.

In today’s story, one friend is getting married and one is about to start a new job, and it seems that they can’t see eye to eye on what’s the most important.

Let’s see how the story unfolds…

AITA for not going to my friend’s “wedding” after what she said to me?

A few months ago, a friend of mine told me she was getting married.

It wasn’t meant to be a regular wedding but more of an elopement kind of thing.

We were supposed to be her, the groom, me (as a Maid of Honor) and a Best man, plus a few close family members, about 10 people in total, and it was planned for early November.

I say “wedding” like that in the title because there will be no invites, no “save the date”, no ceremony, no walk down the aisle, just courthouse and dinner (that comes from the bride herself, I’m not guessing anything).

She got a new job.

A week ago I got the news that I had gotten a permanent job.

I don’t know how to explain it because this is a very typical thing from my country, Spain, where every so often, the government will hire professionals to work either in the administration or in public institutions (education, high school…)

This is usually a great opportunity because these positions are for life (well, until you retire) and they can never fire you.

In order to apply for these positions, you have to take an exam, and then depending on your years of service to the institution and the score you get on the exam, you can get one of those jobs.

Her friend didn’t seem excited about the job.

Long story short, I took my exam last year and last week I got told that I got one of the jobs, but I will be moving cities for that.

When I told my friend this, the only thing she said is “when are you leaving?? Can you still come to my wedding?”

No congratulations, no “i’m happy for you”, nothing.

Now she doesn’t want to go to the wedding.

I must add, two weeks ago I talked to her to know where were we having dinner for her wedding, and she said she didn’t have anything planned yet, let alone booked.

Had she told me she had everything booked and that she really needed my RSVP, i would’ve understood her answer, but in that context, I’ve decided that if the only thing she cares about is her and her wedding, and she can’t be happy for me.

I’m not going to the wedding.

AITA?

The bride is obviously preoccupied by her wedding, so this doesn’t seem like a friendship deal breaker.

But let’s see how Reddit responded…

This reader points out that she is obviously very important to her friend.

Another reader points out that she is just as self-absorbed as her friend.

This reader thinks she is misinterpreting her friend.

This person thinks she isn’t taking the wedding seriously enough.

She should definitely still go to the wedding.

This doesn’t seem like a reason to end a friendship!

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.