Parents always swear they won’t accidentally treat the second child differently…and then suddenly one kid has a personalized magical holiday tradition while the other is just standing there wondering where her balloons are.

This mom says her son was born on St. Patrick’s Day, which accidentally evolved into an entire annual “leprechaun” event complete with decorations, mischief, coins, streamers, and birthday magic that lasts for days. At first, she genuinely thought it was just a fun thing families did for all little kids, kind of like Elf on the Shelf. But somewhere along the way, the tradition quietly became something that exists exclusively for her son because of his birthday.

Now she’s looking at her younger daughter’s birthdays—and especially the smaller first birthday party they gave her—and starting to panic that years from now, Amy might look back and realize her brother got a whole magical childhood production while she mostly got “second child energy.”

AITAH for thinking my daughter will look back and wonder why we treated her differently?

Our son (5) Ken was born on St Patrick’s day. When I was near my due date with our daughter (2) Amy, I hoped it’d be 11/11 so both my kids had a “lucky” “holiday” birthday, but she wasn’t.

Second child thing is 100% a thing. I haven’t felt as controlling of things for her as I did when Ken was born with making everything just right (there was a lot of anxiety when he was born, could also pertain to being a covid baby).

Ken has had a party every year since his 1st bday with all our friends and family. Amy had a small party in our home with some close family and even fewer friends invited due to size. We wanted to have a big party and planned to maybe hold one later for her, but weren’t able to. She did get a big party at her second bday, but I still feel guilty for that first one.

Oh no…

2 years ago I was babysitting my niece (5) and she was saying she needed to make a leprechaun trap for school. We helped her build one and built one ourselves. This is the third year a leprechaun has been to our home causing mischief for a week before the 17th. Here is where the real issue begins.

I thought that the leprechaun was a new thing that parents were doing for their kids like the elf in the shelf. In no way did I think it was going to be strictly a leprechaun visiting Ken because of his birthday. That is what it has turned into.

Ken gets so excited about “Rascal” each year (third year doing it), but apparently neither my brother nor sister did it this year for their kids (did it last two) because leprechauns are only coming for kids born on st Patrick’s day. Idk how the heck that happened. But I at least thought the leprechaun was here visiting Amy as well.

Oh how things escalate!

My mom made a comment when I picked both kids up last night that she was told differently. I didn’t get to talk to my husband last night about it, but we woke up early to decorate this morning.

This is the third year that Ken had woken up to balloons and streamers everywhere for his birthday.

I asked DH if we were leaving some coins behind for Amy. He said no since the leprechaun is only here for Ken.

I see the issue…

I asked if that meant we were going to find something special to do for Amy’s birthday then. He said no. He said that by the time she’s old enough to realize there was a leprechaun for Ken’s birthday, we will have stopped because Ken will be old enough to know they aren’t real.

I don’t believe that’s true. We started the leprechaun when Ken turned 3, only 8 months older than Amy is now. Even if we do it two more times, it’s enough for her to know.

Also, when she’s an adult, I don’t want her to look back and wonder why we basically did a weeklong celebration of her brothers birthday where he’d wake up to streamers and balloons everywhere, and she didn’t.

Yeah, that’s fair.

Coupled with the first birthday and second child syndrome, is it wrong to worry about her feeling differently?

My husband thinks I’m ridiculous for wanting to figure something out for her birthday.

We fought about it, and he thinks I’m an AH for trying to make things more difficult.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this story about a mother whose attitude ruined a sweet gift from her child.

Reddit mostly landed somewhere between YTA and ESH, with a lot of people gently pointing out that OP may be spiraling a little too hard over the Great Leprechaun Inequality of 2026. Many commenters felt this is less “future emotional damage” and more “one kid happened to be born on a holiday that naturally lends itself to tiny green chaos.”

A lot of people also pointed out that siblings almost never grow up with perfectly mirrored childhoods anyway. One kid gets the dinosaur phase, one gets the Disney phase, one gets the random birthday gimmick that accidentally becomes family lore. That’s just kind of how families work. Several commenters thought OP’s lingering guilt about the smaller first birthday may be making the situation feel much bigger than it actually is.

That said, people still felt the husband was being unnecessarily dismissive about her concerns instead of just brainstorming a fun birthday tradition for Amy too.

This person says this definitely isn’t fair, and to change things ASAP.

This person says not only is OP the AH, but so is the husband.

And this person says everyone is the jerk.

The general consensus? Equal love does not require equal access to leprechauns.