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It’s really admirable to want to help a family member recover from surgery. Not everyone would want to do that. However, if you don’t live near the family member who needs help, that can make helping a lot more challenging.

In this story, one woman wants to help her dad recover from surgery, but they live on opposite sides of the country. That means it would make it pretty expensive for her to visit him, and she can’t afford the trip.

What should she do? Keep reading to find out what she’s considering doing and to decide if you think that’s a good idea or not.

WIBTAH- Asking for money

I (30F) have a dad who is 64.

I live in California and he lives in Vermont.

He recently fell and shattered his shoulder, needs a whole replacement.

I have no money currently but want to go out there to care give for him because he has a brain tumor as well (non cancerous) and is scared to death.

OP is the only person willing to help.

My brother and sister live in Vermont but refuse to help.

I’m the only relative in general who wants to help.

All my friends say I’d be the jerk to ask publicly on Facebook because I should have the money but since I’ve been out of work, nobody wants to pay for my vacation ….

Is it an awful move to ask for donations for a trip since it’s not a vacation but more of a welfare check and caregiving for my dad who has to have an entire shoulder replacement?

OP wants to help but can’t afford the trip. Would it be unreasonable to ask for money on Facebook?

I think a GoFundMe might be a better idea. Or, ask the brother and sister if they’d be willing to help pay for her plane ticket.

Let’s see what Reddit suggests.

This person doesn’t think she should ask for money.

Another person has questions.

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This person doesn’t see anything wrong with asking.

Another person has more questions.

I wonder why she lives in California. Since she doesn’t have a job, unless she’s married with kids, is anything tying her to California?

Perhaps she doesn’t need money for a trip. Perhaps she needs money to relocate back to Vermont so she can help her dad long term.

Regardless, she can ask for the money, but she shouldn’t be surprised if nobody donates.

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Author

Jayne Elliott

Jayne Elliott | Contributing Writer, Life & Drama

Jayne Elliott is a contributing writer and editor for TwistedSifter specializing in human interest stories, internet culture, and family dynamics. With over 12 years of editorial experience in digital publishing, Jayne excels at analyzing complex online communities and transforming viral social debates into thoughtful, highly engaging narratives.

Rather than simply aggregating internet drama, Jayne brings a sharp, empathetic editorial eye to everyday dilemmas. She has a unique talent for unpacking the nuances of pop culture and online conflicts, providing readers with relatable, well-researched commentary.

Based in California, Jayne spends her free time outside the newsroom exploring theme parks with her family or beach-combing along the coast.

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