Anybody can call a person an a**hole or any other obvious insult, but it takes a true artist to insult someone without them picking up on it.

So feel free to use some of these insults that don’t really sound like insults next time you want to put someone in their place!

Get started now!

Burn!

“Not necessarily an insult more than a jokey comment to a coworker but I love it.

“Has anyone told you you’re doing a good job today?”

(Responds ‘no’)

“Think about that”.”

LOL.

“What my buddy’s dad said to him after he got a digger stuck, then got a trailer stuck trying to free the digger, then got both un-stuck with a truck.

“You know, I really admire your ability to get out of these kind of situations… most people would just avoid getting into them in the first place, but I really admire your ability to get out of these kind of situations!””

Ouch…

“I don’t know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.”

Is that a good thing?

“You continue to meet expectations.”

It’s nicely subtle.”

Think about it…

“If someone asks for a work reference, you can say: “. . .any employer would be lucky to get this person to work for them.”

A real dummy.

“My favorite one is “Sounds like you weren’t burdened with an overabundance of schooling”.”

That hurts.

“I once made a moderately humorous remark among some friends and one person said to me:

“That’s the funniest thing you’ve ever said”

I think they meant well but it really was quite the burn.”

Hmmm…

“I got the “I’ll give that the attention it deserves” from one of my bosses. It always made me laugh, even if I wasn’t joking about whatever it was I suggested.”

A good one!

“There’s a Yiddish one: “I hope someone names a child after you.”

It sounds nice until you realize that Jews don’t name children after living relatives.”

Oh…

“See you later”

“Not if I see you first”

This has become so common in language that people don’t realize it’s an insult. You’re literally saying if I see you first, I’m going to avoid you.”

I love it!

“I hope the rest of your day is as pleasant as you are.”

There are surely disgusting people who will take this as a compliment thinking they are nice.”

Over your head.

“I had a coworker come up to me when I was new and say, ” You know. I don’t care what all the other guys say, you’re a hell of a worker man.”

And he had like a mischievous smile and I was just like thank you man, appreciate that.

I didn’t realize till break that he was saying everyone talks s**t about you and started cracking up that I just took it as a compliment.”

That’ll show ’em.

“When someone gives you unsolicited advice, tell them it’s “worth every penny I paid for it”.”

Burns abound!