Wife Lays Down The Law When Hubby’s Parents Visit And Completely Disrupt Their Kids’ Schedules. – ‘The house is a disaster.’
by Trisha Leigh
Before I had kids, I never would have imagined I would be a schedule person.
After kids, schedules are the way I survive, and the way my kids thrive even when the rest of our lives and home are chaos.
This mom is the same way, and the only time she struggles with keeping her schedule is when her in-laws come visit 4 or 5 times a year.
We live three blocks away from my parents and they see our kids almost every day. Hey husband’s parents live a couple of states away and only see the kids a few times a year.
It’s easy when we go see them since we only visit when the kids are off school.
But when they come see us it is at random intervals through the year.
Not a problem really they are excellent grandparents. With one small exception. They think our rules go out the window when they visit.
They don’t understand why the kids must follow the rules and stick to the schedule even though they are there to see them and have fun together.
It’s mean that we don’t make the kids their favorite food every day. Why can’t the kids watch tv with them before they do their chores and homework. Why do the kids have to be in bed so early.
It drives me crazy that I’m the bad guy because my husband won’t put his foot down so I have to do it.
OP tried holding her ground, even took the kids to her parents’ house for the night, but when her husband refused to back her up she washed her hands of the whole situation.
They came last week. On Monday as soon as dinner was over they wanted the kids to pay attention to them.
They wanted to take the kids to see Avatar.
On a school night.
My husband allowed it.
I told him that he knew that throwing the kids off there schedule screwed me over. So I gave him the choice of either enforcing our rules or I would.
He said he would take care of it.
Second night there was a hockey game on. He wanted to watch it with our son who loves hockey. I reminded my husband that our son had chores to do and homework. He said it was just a hockey game.
I told the kids to get their stuff.
I took them and a change of clothes and their homework to my parents’ house. My mom and dad will watch them and then take them to school in the morning.
I went back home and they were waiting for me. I’m being a controlling and abusive person by denying them time with the kids.
I’m not the only person allowed to make decisions regarding the kids. They came all this way to see them and I’m being a jerk by keeping them on a schedule.
She started going out in the evenings and staying at her parents’ house instead of the kids.
Fine. They are visiting for a couple of weeks.
Wednesday after I picked up the kids from school and dropped them off at home with my in-laws. Then I went out for the first time in ages.
I told my husband I would be out late and didn’t want to wake anyone so I would be at my parents’ house.
Did the same thing Thursday through tonight.
Now her husband is begging her to come home because the house is a mess and the kids are missing their homework and her son can’t find his basketball shirt.
My husband has been calling and texting and coming over to tell me I need to come home because the house is a disaster because his parents won’t do anything. They are in vacation and they are there to see the kids not clean up.
The kids are having a fun time with no rules and he has been contacted by the school because no homework was turned in on Thursday or Friday.
My son just texted me about his gym clothes for today. I guess he never put them on the hamper and they didn’t get washed.
I didn’t answer those texts.
I said I would be back after his parents left or he enforced the rules. He said I was taking it too far and that it was affecting his work.
Honestly tough doo.
She doesn’t feel badly about the lesson they’re all learning, but should she?
The top comment says no, and is applauding her besides.
This person agrees, stating she is not their maid and they are being lazy.
They say it’s high time everyone learned their lesson.
And this commenter hopes the husband will be more of a team player in the future.
But really, the issue starts with the grandparents.
The in-laws being clueless is one thing, but the husband is another.
He’d better shape up or he’ll have to figure out how to parent alone on an every-other-weekend basis.