January 14, 2024 at 4:28 pm

His Family Continues To Berate His Wife, So He’s Bowing Out Of His Only Sibling’s Wedding

by Trisha Leigh

Source: Reddit/AITA

One of the issues that seems to crop up in Reddit relationships fairly often is people who take the side of their family of origin over their spouse’s.

This didn’t happen here, though, but OP is wondering if he went too far.

He comes from a family that is more highly educated than his partner’s.

I (35/M) come from an intellectually pretentious family. I married into a very blue collar family. Through out my adult life, my older sister (38) has always disapproved of my partners.

I met my wife when she was in college and I was in the Navy. My sister immediately disliked the bubbly and unfiltered college girl and determined my future wife was untrustworthy and dragging me down.

After she started suffering from a degenerative neurological disorder she medically retired, and since then, things have been rocky.

4 years ago my wife suffered a traumatic brain injury. It occurred right around the time we conceived our second child so we chalked off the dizziness, headaches and other symptoms to her pregnancy.

Nearly a year postpartum the symptoms hadn’t improved and she started scheduling medical appointments to get checked out.

At this point she was in the Navy; I was separated and in grad school. Over the next 18 or so month my wife endured an endless slog appointments, tests, exams, consultations, more tests, more consultations, until it was finally determined that my wife has a rare neurological condition that tbh I don’t fully understand.

She was medically retired and classified as a disabled vet.

During this whole process my sister’s way of being supportive was to tell me its probably nothing and not to worry about it.

At least, between him and his family of origin.

This past weekend I was chatting with my sister. My wife had gotten a holiday job helping deliver packages but called out on black friday to stay at her parent’s longer.

My sister made a comment about my wife “suddenly being sick when she doesn’t feel like working” and claimed my wife had done the same thing to get medically retired from the Navy.

As is the habit in my family, I replied with equally snarky jabs, reminding my sister, who is a nephrologist, that my wife injured her head not her kidney’s and she doesn’t know what she’s talking about.

My sister claimed it took to long because my wife was “doctor shopping” for the diagnosis she wanted.

I told her if I got paid what she did to sit in an office say “keep doing dialysis,” I wouldn’t have personal days either.

Now he’s drawing a line in the sand.

I had confronted my sister and my mother in the past about their accusations that my wife was “milking the system” and needed to “suck it up.” After some very heated exchanges they had gotten better about keeping their thoughts to themselves (a feat with my family) but this one pulled no punches.

My Sister is getting married in September and I told her unless she apologizes and admits she doesn’t know anything about my wife’s medical history we won’t be in attendance.

Is boycotting my only sibling’s wedding an overreaction? AITA for using choosing the wedding as the event not to attend when it is such an important day to her?

Did he go too far? Reddit will let him know!

The top comment really empathizes with OP’s wife.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This person agrees they should reduce contact with his family overall.

Source: Reddit/AITA

They think the sister is being willfully obtuse.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Everyone feels for what OP’s spouse has been going through.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This person is proud of OP for sticking up for his wife.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This sister is a real piece of work.

I’m glad OP seems to have his head screwed on straight.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.