February 18, 2024 at 8:45 pm

Her Grandparents Gave Her Money To Get A Haircut, But Her Parents Yelled At Her For “Wasting” It Because Her Brother Needs Cancer Treatment

by Trisha Leigh

Source: Reddit/AITA

This is such a hard post to write up as a parent – because I genuinely can’t imagine anything worse than watching one of your children fight a losing battle for their life.

That said, it does other children a disservice to forget that they are also living the only childhood they’re ever going to get.

OP is a teenager living in a blended home. Her youngest stepbrother, still an infant, has cancer.

My mom got married to “Alan” 2 years ago. I (15f) was 13 at the time and Alan’s two kids were “Emma” (9f) and “Noah” (3m).

Noah was diagnosed with cancer last year and my mom and her husband were told there’s some kind of different treatment he could get in another country and if they could raise the money, it would be better for Noah than the treatments available in the US.

In order to pay for an experimental treatment, her parents have cut out all “unnecessary” spending.

My mom and Alan could not afford it so they have been sending him to treatment here and saving for Noah’s treatment.

They made a lot of cutbacks and asked that Emma and I give over any money we get so they can afford this.

They have about 70% or something now and that has come from cutting out a lot. We eat very basic meals, they cancelled our internet and we didn’t do anything for our birthdays or Christmas since the saving started.

Any money that comes into the house goes on essentials or the treatment fund.

OP got some money from her paternal grandparents and used it on pretty basic stuff.

My dad died 9 years ago and my paternal family stayed part of my life. They know what has been going on and they have been buying me little treats and taking me out to eat when they can.

They also give me money every couple of weeks so I can have something if I ever need anything. I have been hiding that money because I know I would be told to give it up.

I carry it everywhere because Emma is the type to snoop and then tell her dad. She has asked me before why I don’t babysit to help make more money for her brother. She would work if she could but she’s only 11.

I spent some of the money from my grandparents over the weekend. I got my hair cut and I bought my best friend a gift for her birthday. I also got some food and spent some time at my dad’s grave.

She was screamed and yelled at, even called names.

My mom noticed my haircut and asked where the money came from and she realized I was lying when I said I had been with my grandparents and they took me because I forgot they were out of town.

So I told her they gave me some money to get some stuff done. She told me a haircut was not a need and how selfish could I be. Alan heard her scolding me and he jumped in and asked what was wrong with me.

He told me this family has to pull together for Noah and I am acting like I don’t care whether Noah gets this treatment or not.

Of course by the end of the day Emma heard and freaked out. But then my mom ran into my best friends mom a couple of days ago, and she told mom my gift to my best friend was so sweet and thoughtful.

I was sat down and yelled at for spending the money on not just me but on others. Alan asked me how I could give the money for a gift that means nothing when it could have gone to save “my brother’s” life.

OP doesn’t want her stepbrother to die, but she also doesn’t think she should be forced to completely go without either.

I yelled back that it’s not my job to pay for Noah’s treatments and I’m already sacrificing but I refuse to go all out the way they want me to. I told them the money came from my family, family who was nothing to them and they need to let it go.

Alan called me a selfish little b—– and he told me I should be ashamed of my repulsive behavior. Now Emma keeps telling me I’m a bad person.


Does Reddit think she’s wrong? Can they see the parents’ side? Let’s find out!

The top comment agrees this is not the way.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This person agrees her stepfather is being abusive.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Maybe her grandparents could help advocate for her.

Source: Reddit/AITA

As tough as the situation is, this is not an excuse for her parents to act this way.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Everyone agrees OP doesn’t deserve to be treated this way.

Source: Reddit/AITA

My heart hurts for this whole family.

That said, her mother is for sure losing sight of the bigger picture.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.