March 7, 2024 at 10:41 pm

Her Friend Wants Her To Cover Up Her Biopsy Scar And Not Wear A Bikini. She Says No And Tells Her She Shouldn’t Be “Triggered”

by Ryan McCarthy

Source: Reddit/AITA/Pexels

Noticeable scars on someone’s body can do a lot to hurt their self-confidence.

After injuries or surgeries that leave people with big scars, it can take a long time before their comfortable in their own skin, let alone confident enough to show their scar.

So when they do choose to show some skin, maybe the best move isn’t to tell them their body is making you uncomfortable!

Well apparently this user’s friend didn’t get that memo, when she told OP that her visible biopsy scar was triggering her because of her Mom’s ongoing cancer treatment!

Check it out!

AITA for refusing to cover my scar and wearing a bikini as it triggered my friend?

I 24f had a cancer scare a few years back and had a biopsy done on my upper leg.

The scar has faded now, but it is still fairly noticeable and about 7cm long. Thankfully, it was only a scare and nothing came of it.

For a while I was insecure about it and stopped wearing skirts or tight leggings where you could see the outline of the scar.

Now I have accepted it’s going to be there, and I’ve started to wear whatever and realized nobody cares about it apart from the odd question.

But to OP’s surprise, her scar became an issue during a group beach day.

We went to the beach yesterday as a friend group and I wore a bikini. I was excited to get a tan and my friend Anna brought her other friend Dana 25f.

I have met her before but don’t know her very well, however I do know she started a fundraiser for her mom who is fighting cancer right now.

Dana’s family situation is quite difficult as her dad passed away recently and her mom has stage 4 and Dana is juggling a lot.
I came earlier than Anna and Dana so I was already in my bikini when they joined us and Dana was nice to me and asked about my new job.

And once their mutual friend left, Dana’s attitude took a left turn.

Then Anna went to say hi to the others and Dana mentioned my scar and recognized it was a biopsy.

She asked if I could wear a beach cover up because it was triggering to her, and that it was insensitive of me as I know her mum is going through it right now.

I said no I’m here to get a tan and the cover up will ruin that and Dana didn’t say anything but didn’t talk to me for the rest of the day.

The next day OP learned Dana had talked to Anna about the whole situation.

Today Anna texted me telling me Dana told her what happened.

While she agreed Dana’s comment was weird, she said I should have given her a free pass as she is not in the best place mentally right now.

I said it was really weird and no I wouldn’t.

I genuinely don’t think I am in the wrong and think she’s being really weird about the situation.

Obviously if I am in the wrong I will apologize.

I understand where Dana is coming from, but asking someone to cover hide body because it makes you uncomfortable is just never okay.

As OP said, it wasn’t easy for her to get to a place where she was ok with her scars.

And as someone with family going through the same thing, you’d think Dana would be a little more sensitive to it!

Reddit was sympathetic to Dana, but said it in no way gave her license to tell other people what to do with their bodies.

Source: Reddit/AITA

And Dana’s use of the word triggered sparked a debate in the comments.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Many agreed, saying being triggered and having an emotional response are two very different things.

Source: Reddit/AITA

And this commenter said being triggered by someone’s body is Dana’s issue to sort through, not OP’s.

Source: Reddit/AITA

And finally, this person questioned how Dana would react to someone going through chemotherapy, or any other visible form of cancer treatment.

Source: Reddit/AITA

If other people’s bodies bother you so much, maybe you shouldn’t be going to a beach!

Get a life…

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.