When you get access to someone’s credit card, a bunch of ethics and etiquette apply, but the rules are ambiguous and up for interpretation.

Shots will fire if someone overspends your money, but they can easily claim a loophole and feelings can get hurt. It’s extra sad when kids get caught in the middle.

Check out the drama that sparked when these separated parents made a deal about their toddler’s birthday party, but I don’t think we have the context we need to pass judgment on either party.

AITA for refusing to plan my son’s birthday party because of how my ex behaved when I planned our daughter’s?

I have two children with my ex.

Our daughter’s 5th birthday was the first birthday we weren’t together so we came to the agreement that I would plan everything and he would pay for it.

He said I could spend as much money as I wanted and since our daughter was taking the breakup badly, I wanted to go all out for her special day.

The audacity! When you have someone’s money at your fingertips, you should have total autonomy and privacy when you use it. (Eye roll)

I had his credit card.

He kept demanding I tell him everything I’d booked and would criticize every little thing.

This is the part in the soap opera when the ex-wife throws a drink in her ex’s face, right?

Our son’s 2nd birthday is next month and my ex has once again suggested I plan the party and he’ll pay for it.

I’ve refused because I’m not going to let him make me feel the way he did while I planned our daughter’s again.

Tell him it’s unforgivable and you owe him a shopping spree with his card. It’s the least he can do.

I told him he would need to plan the party and that I wanted no part in it.

He has apologized for how he behaved and he claims he’d never do it again.

Is he wrong, though? Or is he supposed to hire a party planner?

Since I won’t plan the party, he’s making up BS claims that I favour our daughter over our son.

He’s also said if I don’t plan a party our son wouldn’t have one since he’s too busy to plan it but he could always ask his mother for help.

AITA?

Let’s see what people in the comments had to say.

If you ask me she should have been allowed to rent a bouncy castle and a merry-go-round.

True, but that’s not Instagram-worthy and can’t help you one-up your kids’ friends’ birthdays.

I like this solution. No drama and your kid gets double the experience and love.

Um, no. It’s still his kid and you don’t use your kid as a pawn to get back at your ex, his father. Yeesh.

He could have handled this better, but I don’t think we have enough information to say if his response was controlling.

And people wonder why so many children of divorce are scarred for life.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.