May 26, 2024 at 11:11 pm

Dad Tries To Force His Stepkids To Stay With His Wife While He’s Out Of Town, But She Says That Will Only Make Them Loathe Her More

by Ryan McCarthy

Source: Reddit/AITA/Pexels

In a perfect world, children of divorce would get along perfectly with their parent’s new partners.

But in the real world, its a sad truth that all too often step-parents are the object of some serious frustration and resentment from their step children.

And while you can’t fault the kids for reacting emotionally to the breakup of their parents, you also can’t just force them to like your new girlfriend or boyfriend!

This user learned that all too well when her husband’s ex wife turned her stepkids against her, leading to them protesting being alone with her while their Dad was on a trip.

OP told her husband that forcing them to stay with her would only make things worse, but he wasn’t listening to a word she said!

Was she in the wrong to tell him to let them stay with their Mom? See for yourself!

AITA for telling my husband to listen to his kids because I’d be the one facing the repercussions if he doesn’t?

I (36f) have been married to my husband Nick (42m) for almost 6 years now. My husband has two teenagers with his ex-wife Lyndsey (40f) and they have been divorced for 11 years.

My stepdaughter is Melody (15f) and my stepson is Jace (13m). My husband and I also have a 14 month old son together.

Nick and Lyndsey have shared custody of my stepkids. And typically they can get along okay…ish.

It’s not what anyone would call a friendly co-parenting relationship and both can be stubborn with the other at times.

I’d hate to see them forced to sit in a room all day to mediate but it’s not as bad as some divorced people I have seen in my life.

Unsurprisingly, OP said her own relationship with her husband’s ex was pretty rough as well…

My relationship with Lyndsey is not good anymore.

Around a year into my marriage she grew annoyed that she and Nick would be harder to reach than me and I was getting more calls from the kids school when they were sick or whatever.

Jace has some health issues so it’s a common enough thing for him.

It made Lyndsey extremely jealous and on her custody time I would be calling her to try and get the kid who was sick or to make plans with her.

But her job made it difficult for her to be reached hence me being the only one available to pick them up.

And once Lyndsey had turned on OP, there was no changing her mind, and her attitude soon started affecting the kids.

Once we got to the point where she was jealous there was no going back.

I had hoped during Covid and the kids not being in school that it would maybe take care of some of the jealousy, but it didn’t. And once she turned against me so did the kids.

We had a close relationship before and now they don’t want that with me. They complain if Nick leaves them with me for a couple of hours or when I pick them up from school.

They’re not as open and talkative with me. I spoke to them, Nick spoke to them, he spoke to Lyndsey and we even did some family therapy together.

But the relationship is not what it once was, and it is not what it was on track to become before the issues.

This posed a serious problem for OP, as she soon would have to watch her stepkids for an extended time while Nick was away.

Recently my husband learned that during his parenting time he will be out of town for four days in May. Those four days fall on his parenting time with my stepkids.

He wants them to stay with me for the four days so he can see them for a few hours on the day he comes back before they go to their mom’s house.

The kids do not want to stay at the house with me during that time. They want to be with their mom. They were annoyed he wanted them to stay with me.

It started a fight between the three of them and the kids told Lyndsey and she wants the kids to be with her, but the parenting agreement doesn’t have a clause about this.

But when OP told Nick to let them stay with their Mom, he was having none of it.

I told Nick he should listen to the kids and he told me it won’t help anything if they refuse to stay in the house with me while he’s not there.

I told him he better listen to the kids because I’ll be the one facing the repercussions of him not doing so.

He told me I should want the kids with me and I told him not when I’ll be dealing with their anger and disrespect while he’s gone. AITA?

What a tough situation for OP, especially because she wants to have a good relationship with her kids, but knows that being alone with them will only exacerbate the issues between them.

Reddit sided with OP, saying it wasn’t just her relationship with the stepkids, at risk, but the husband’s as well!

Source: Reddit/AITA

And this user suggested OP take a vacation of her own to avoid the whole situation!

Source: Reddit/AITA

Many wondered what was stopping OP’s husband from just visiting his ex’s house to see his kids when he got back from his trip.

Source: Reddit/AITA

But this commenter thought the comments blaming OP’s husband were completely unfair.

Source: Reddit/AITA

But even with his defenders, many people thought OP’s husband was being too generous with other people’s time!

Source: Reddit/AITA

Let Lyndsey watch her own kids if she hates OP so much!

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.